Review: Rippler

Good Vibes Rippler dildo on concrete.
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The Pleasure Works Rippler is like what the Tantus Echo wants to be when it grows up. It is a beast. A glimmering, swirly green beast; a beast that, sadly, promises much more than it delivers.

I know. Despite the fact that I love large dildos, textured dildos, and toys that come in green, and despite the fact that I would’ve bet money I would enjoy this dildo before I tried it… I cannot find it in my heart to fully endorse the Rippler. I’ve never, since the first time I tried it, been psyched to use it.

My first issue with the Rippler is that it is very, very stiff. Which I know makes no sense, since I adore wood, stainless steel, and glass. But I might as well admit it: my vag has been wooed by dual-density silicones such as VixSkin. Regular silicone just isn’t doing it for me much these days, and this is some of the least squishy silicone I’ve ever encountered.

Does the ribbed texture feel nice? Sure, but I’ve had better. The Echo feels much nicer to me, probably because it’s fashioned out of more plush silicone.

Does it hit my G-spot? Somewhat, but take notice of the size of the Rippler’s head. It’s not bulbous or overly curved; it’s actually quite small. In use, that translates to mediocre G-spot stimulation, which is just not acceptable to me, especially from a dildo of this magnitude. (I’m not exactly sure what I mean by that, but doesn’t it sound amazing?)

There’s just… other things I’d rather have in my vagina. Like, say I was doing a blind vagina test (WOULDN’T THAT BE AWESOME) with a multitude of toys. The Rippler is not one that would stand out to me; I would not be saying, “ooh, what’s that one?” while being penetrated with it. And sure, that’s better than “get it out of my vagina NOW!”, but it’s not a ringing endorsement, either.

The Rippler comes in a large plastic clamshell brandished with a list of perks such as “elegant stylized shape,” “harness-compatible,” “curved for G-spot or prostate pleasure,” and “designed by experienced sex educators.” And yes, it has a nice base that would work in a harness with a big enough O ring.

The Rippler is a formidable dildo if you want something stiff, girthy, and made of silicone — emphasis on the “stiff.” However, its G-spotting capabilities are sub-par, which is a deal-breaker in my world. For simultaneous texture and G-spot stimulation, I’ll grab my Jellyfish instead. And if I want a monstrosity, I’ll use Randy.