May 312010
 

Dearest Turbo Glider,

Hello, my dear. It’s been a while, I know. A few trysts here and there, but things between us are nothing like they used to be. I understand if you feel neglected; I barely get you out from the drawer at all. The truth is, my clit now prefers less buzzy, more unique toys. But don’t cry; you will always be in my heart. I will always remember you fondly as my first true sex toy love.

It was February of 2007, and I was in search of something cheap to get me off. I picked you up from the mail room at college and for a solid year afterward, you were my only sex toy. I only used you clitorally, and I thought of nothing else. What else was there to want? Something quieter, sure, but that wasn’t a huge issue. Besides, quietness usually means less power, and I could never sacrifice the power you afforded me.

OH, THE POWER! It’s still hard to find this much power in a clitoral stimulator. Expensive toys like the Mia, the Bcurious, and the Better than Chocolate don’t even come close.

And there are other things I love about you, too, Turbo Glider. You are BLUE, not hot pink or purple. And I love your translucency, which allows me to watch your little motor whirl away. I love your shape — the bloops! — and how your tip sits against my clit perfectly. And I love that you really are waterproof; several unsatisfying bathtime romps with other toys have led to me yell at the boyfriend, “bring the blue one!”

You are a trooper, Turbo Glider, and that is why I appreciate you. I am certain that you are the best sex toy out there for $20 (and often less!).  For that, I will continue recommending you like crazy. I may have outgrown you for most occasions, but that doesn’t make you any less awesome.

Love always,
Epiphora

Get the Turbo Glider (under various names) at one of my fave shops:
SheVibeBabelandEarly to Bed, Pleasure Chest, or Come As You Are (Canada).

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