The best Christmas list ever

This festive clip is the best 28 seconds of video majesty I’ve seen in quite a while:

I mean, does it get any better?

Pugs and Fleshlights — in ONE VIDEO. I love it. My sex-toy-obsessed heart swells.

In case you are scarred, though, here is a video of pugs not being sexualized:

And let this post also serve as an announcement of a short blogging hiatus, while I relax and celebrate Christmas with my family. I will be back with more snark and reviews very soon.

Happy holidays, everyone! Stay warm and give your loved ones extra-long hugs.