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True Life: I’m A Sex Toy Reviewer

Why MTV didn’t pick me for True Life: I’m Famous Online, I’ll never know. So I made my own tag. See also #sexbloggerlyfe.

A keyboard spelling out "SEX." Because sex blogging = a rearranged keyboard, duh.
BanterBlogger LyfeFeminism's Not a Dirty WordTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy ReviewerWhine Time

I blog about sex. That is not an invitation.

Yes indeed, I run what the general population would call a “sex blog.” I spend my days drafting posts about...
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NobEssence Seduction among some green leaves.
BanterTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

So kiss me and smile for me…

Today I sent one of my favorite toys away. It was my NobEssence Seduction. It developed white splotches in one...
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BanterToybox ReportsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

Dildo desk takeover

A couple days ago, I decided it was time. Time to clean ALL THE THINGS — err, actually organize my sex...
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Those wild 'n' free cords you see? For my Kindle and iPod. The sex toy cords are wrapped up nicely.
BanterToybox ReportsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

Sex toy storage: chargers and lube edition

Rechargeable sex toys can free people from the burden of clunky batteries, but there’s one side effect that kinda sucks:...
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BanterTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

Obama will be president, and seven other awesome things

Barack Obama will be our next president. I’m not a hugely political person, but I was worried all day and...
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Vixen Creations Randy dildo in the chocolate color, chilling with some moss on my patio.
Adventures in SquirtingAnyway How's Your Sex Life?BanterDildosGreatest HitsHi, I love youSex Toy ReviewsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

Review: Randy

Randy Field Diary, Day #1 — Arrival My vagina is not ready for the brown beast they classify as “Randy.”...
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My new Facebook fan page.
BanterDisingenuous AssholesSound Off!True Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

I’m sick of you, Facebook

Facebook hates sex bloggers. This is well-established. They’ve disabled my account twice now. The first time, they told me I...
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Coffee and the Tantus Goddess
BanterTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

New arrival: Goddess

With a 30% off coupon, I have bought my very first 100% silicone watch-battery-using dildo. It is, fittingly, named Goddess....
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BanterToybox ReportsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

All good things must be replaced

I knew my Xtreme Pack G-spot bullet would die; it was just a matter of time. It had already outlived...
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BanterToybox ReportsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

A hint of organization

My sex toy collection has been slowly creeping out of the two For Your Nymphomation cases it was in. Many...
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BanterTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

New arrival: Ophoria Pleasure No. 6

Today the mail guy brought me the Ophoria Pleasure No. 6 dildo. I was surprised to find that it is...
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3D-printed clitoris organ, showing the entire external and internal structure, on a galaxy backdrop.
Anyway How's Your Sex Life?BanterGreatest HitsGuidesSunshine & RainbowsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

The clitoris: still the center of my universe

Hi, my name’s Epiphora, and I almost always need clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm. I thought this was common...
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A decade of sex blogging. Cupcake butt plug and Shilo.
Anyway How's Your Sex Life?BanterBlogger LyfeBreak Out the TissuesGreatest HitsShenanigansSunshine & RainbowsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

A decade of sex blogging

The cliché is true — it feels like just yesterday and like forever ago. This week marks 10 years since...
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The Sybian... and packing materials.
Air Flow, Thrusters & MovementAnyway How's Your Sex Life?BanterGreatest HitsSex Toy ReviewsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy ReviewerVibrators

Today in my life… a stranger on the internet gifted me a Sybian

In this episode of True Life: I’m a Sex Toy Reviewer, I am in disbelief as I unbox this sex machine,...
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Tantus Sherbet in its old packaging
BanterTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

Tantus Sherbet and old packaging

When I searched the universe to find a discontinued Tantus Sherbet (yes, the neon green color fueled my fervor more...
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Sex toy temporary tattoos and the lengths we go through to photograph them. Photo by Kate Sinclaire.
BanterBreak Out the TissuesGreatest HitsShenanigansTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

Together, we form one fully functional human

7 sex bloggers were standing outside a glass blowing studio. We’d been waiting for an hour and there was no sign...
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Illustration of Epiphora

Hi, I’m Piph, and I have a very discerning vagina.

For over 15 years, I’ve been testing sex toys and writing about them on the internet.

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Very fave sex shops

SheVibe: my all-time fave, with a selection that will blow your brains out Spectrum Boutique: a hip, modern sex shop dedicated to body-safe toys and radical inclusion Lovehoney: the best place to shop for international orders

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Latest posts

Epiphora's best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday!

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday! (2024)

Me wearing my harness with the Vixen Creations Leo dildo inside, an orange dildo with a bat pattern.

Queer sex party chronicles: pumpkin spice orgy

Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool's retrospective

Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool’s retrospective

Epiphora's Black Friday sex toy sales and deals!

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday! (2023)

A circle of people wearing harnesses and dildos, arranged in a circle and shot from above. Dildos pointing into the middle.

Queer sex party chronicles: a magical birthday

Recent comments

Greatest Hits

Me holding the Lovehoney Flash and Doxy Don, demonstrating the way one moves much more visibly than the other (and thus is much rumblier).

Buzzy vs. rumbly: the most important aspect of a vibrator

Vintage vibrators: the Polar Cub Electric Vibrator (top), Oster Massagett, and Vanguard Vibro-Massager.

Review: Vintage vibrators

Liberator Fascinator Shag Throe close-up, with droplets of water all over it.

Review: Fascinator Shag Throw

LELO Mona Wave rechargeable G-spot vibrator on a rainy cement surface.

Review: Mona Wave

Me in my Princessa video review

Video review: Princessa

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