I’ve never told you much about my labia, but I guess now’s as good a time as any. I’d describe my...
Just as I am not a lube connoisseur, I am also not a condom connoisseur. I haven’t tried a ton...
This is all so overwhelming. I want to be clever and make you giggle, but… this website, this product… THERE IS...
Why wouldn’t you want this smug bastard smiling at you while you masturbate? He looks like the kind of guy...
This sex toy is everything I hate. Cutesy. Twee. Pink. Girly. Symbolic. I want to chuck it into a river. So why am...
Me, masturbating: uh, don’t mind me, I’m just over here jamming this ugly-ass hairbrush-lookin’ thing against my vulva in a feeble...
They’ve figured us out, guys. THEY KNOW. People… actually… use… vibrators. The newest model on the shelves is the Tri-Phoria,...
Good morning to me! Hello [my legal name], Please be advised we have disabled your contributor account at EdenFantasys.com This decision...
When I saw this vibrator in its package for the first time, I gasped. It looked gargantuan. Huge. Dong-like. The...
I’ve seen a ton of presumptuous sex toy marketing in my day, but I’d never seen a sex toy that...
You might stumble across the Lovehoney Mini Magic Wand while shopping for the legendary Mystic Wand and think to yourself, “oh! It’s 30%...
This is not cute. This is not adorable. This is not acceptable. A teddy bear with a vibrating muzzle? Really? This...
It sounds wrong to say “my Cry Baby is dead.” But it’s true. Now, I did not drop my Cry...
On the front of the package, a circle of orange spines say, “Try Me.” You feel them; they are glossy,...
I wish the entirety of this review could just be the word no. Not even repeated for emphasis, not even in...
I interrupt your regularly-scheduled happiness to bring you perhaps the most innocuously-named stuff of nightmares ever to exist. It is...