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The Shit List: sex toy companies you should avoid like the plague

You already know which sex toy shops and manufacturers I support. Here are the ones I don’t.


If a retailer isn’t on this list, are they safe to shop with? Not necessarily, since I can’t keep track of the scads of sketchy retailers. Your best best is to purchase from one of the shops I trust. — Yeah, I said it. There are a lot of reasons not to shop on Amazon for sex toys. If you purchase from a trusted sex toy retailer instead, you’re ensured good customer service from good people and I get a much higher percentage of the sale. If you value the work I do, I would appreciate it. — Historically unethical. They treat their employees like shit and fire them suddenly, try to weasel their way out of giving rewards they promised to customers, have zero regard for privacy, and quite possibly send out used sex toys. Their laundry list of fuck-ups goes back to at least 2007. Read my 9,000-word screed about them for all the details.


If a sex toy maker isn’t on this list, does that mean they’re ethical? Sadly, no. I’m bad at keeping this list updated, and it’s hard to know when a sex toy company veers from “ugh” into “avoid like the plague.”

Pipedream — This is one of the biggest sex toy manufacturers in existence, but the only one which has demonstrated a complete lack of class. Their “Fuck Me Silly” line is super misogynist and racist, and they think that is how men want it. They ripped off njoy’s amazing toy designs and cast them in sketchier materials. They made light of sex crimes with their JLaw sex doll. Here’s a thorough run-down of why Pipedream sucks.

Satisfyer — The owner is a misogynist. Receipts forthcoming.

Shiri Zinn — Has tried to censor reviews to fit their nonsensical and sex-negative standards. Likes to threaten people with lawsuits. Unless you absolutely must have their cupcake-shaped vibrator, this’ll be an easy one.

Fifi — This masturbation sleeve company seemed to think using fat-shaming memes on their social media accounts would be a great way to advertise their products. Bloggers called them out and yet, the company never issued an apology. Also, the product has been described as like “jerking off into a sleeping bag-like contraption lined with a mini trash bag.”

Velvet Nest — At least 7 people have ordered from this company and never received anything. The company doesn’t respond to emails, leaving customers to open PayPal disputes to get their money back. Artemisia wrote about her experience with them.

  1. agreed about pipedream, it was brought home even further last year when they bragged about being ‘featured’ on Sons of Anarchy. Uh, it was in a rapey torture den where nonconsensual torture porn was being filmed. They kept sending out press releases about how proud they were. Ew.

  2. Velvet Nest should be added to the shit list. Over the past year, I’ve been contacted by 7 people (because of my VN review) telling me that they ordered from Velvet Nest and never received anything. They don’t respond to emails and then it leaves people to put in a dispute with Paypal.

  3. Vamp Silicone should be added to the shit list. I ordered a Duetto and Valentino directly from them in June as I wanted colors She Vibe didn’t offer. I received the Duetto in July as they said they didn’t want to hold up the whole order waiting on Valentino (which was ordered as a softskin rainbow coloration). This coloration was confirmed by both Vamp Silicone and Tulip Toy Gallery (whom apparently was handling the order some how? They are a sister company from what I understand). On July 28th, I received an email stating that my order was complete. When I expressed concern about this, I was told it was simply because they had no way of marking an order as partially fulfilled (then why complete it?). I was assured that my Valentino would be done soon. On August 13th I contacted Vamp again, and on August 16th I finally got a reply saying it would ship out on the 18th. I never received a tracking number or my item. I emailed back three more times without a response, and finally got a response from the CS supervisor at Tulip on September 8th. I was told my Valentino would be sent out that day. It was not. On September 10th I was told it had to be remade (why would they tell me it was shipping out??). On September 12th, the owner of Vamp Silicone contacted me apologizing and told me that she had just sent out my package… except what she described was NOT what I ordered. I replied back informing her of this, and gave her a copy of the email where they confirmed what I requested. She apologized and said they would make it that weekend and send me pictures. I never received pictures, nor have I ever heard from her again despite me trying to contact her directly. Tulip again was involved and promised they would find out what was going on. On September 19th I finally was told they were having issues making it because rainbows were simply too difficult to do on that model and apparently they are no longer offering them period. At no point had anyone told me there were issues because of what I picked out despite me asking repeatedly in the past if there was a problem. I even said that I was more than happy for the rainbow to be interpreted in ways other than splits. I would have been happy to switch to something else if I had of known it was going to be an issue. However, at this point I was tired of dealing with it all. I asked for a refund of what I paid for Valentino to my PayPal account. It was already way past the 45 day dispute time, so I can’t go that route. I was told it would be handled over the weekend. Not surprisingly, it wasn’t. I emailed Tulip on Sept 22nd stating I did not get the refund and was told they would ask again. Today, September 23rd, I still have no refund. I was told it was done last night “but maybe it takes time to process”. I informed them that I have done enough business on PayPal (both selling and buying) that I knew that it did not, and that likely if there was any problem at all it was due to how old the order was. I was told that the Vamp owner was going to attempt it again that afternoon. I just checked my PayPal account, and surprise surprise… no refund.

    At this point I don’t even know if Tulip shouldn’t be on here as well. They are a sister company, and some of what they have done has been a bit sketchy as well. Like they said they were sending a package of “goodies” to me to smooth things over, but when it failed to show up, I asked for the tracking number. I was given the same tracking number that the Vamp Silicone owner gave me for the package SHE sent me with the wrong stuff in it. They then said that the label was printed, but the package not picked up. They also updated my original order with the goodie box’s actual tracking number… which I don’t like because it makes it look like they sent the item I’m waiting on. If Tulip is so closely related to Vamp, then why can’t this person just go across town and take care of my business rather than just calling and texting?

  4. I really hope you get your refund. Vamp has been really shitty about this and I don’t understand why Tulip Toy Gallery is even involved. It’s just adding another layer to the bullshit you’ve been dealing with. Shame on Vamp.

  5. This makes me so sad. I’m currently waiting for my order from them. They can be hard to get a hold of and my order has taken a week longer than expected but I have gotten pictures and I’m super excited for it to finally get here.

    Vamp seems like such a cool company, I just hope they can get their act together in terms of customer service.

  6. I work in a sex shop that, to my dismay, does sell pipedream products. I had a customer come to me with a set of pipedream kegel balls and ask what material they were made from. I inspected the package and it just said “material: metal.” Yeah. Thats not sketchy at all.

  7. I know this post is old but I NEEDED to add that I once placed an order for a Vibrator with EF, that they shipped off later then expected. When I called to find out where my 65 dollar purchase was, the customer service guy couldn’t stop laughing, whilst reading off the generic name of the vibrator I ordered. It was the most unpleasant experience ordering a toy from a retailer I’ve ever had. I haven’t shopped there sense.

  8. Do you know anything about PleasureTease? It almost seems like the products are priced too low to be legit, but everything I’ve read about them seems positive…

  9. To me that website looks a little sketchy (they don’t even have an “about” page) but I guess they have good ratings here. If you have found my work valuable, though, I’d appreciate you shopping with any of my affiliates instead… that way I receive a commission from the sale.

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