Here we are, in the formerly-futuristic year 2021, and it’s been 14 years since I sat in my college dorm room and typed up my very first sex toy review. My blog is now a teen, the same age I was when I fell in love with a girl for the first time. Should I be asking my blog about its sexuality? Honey, you know you can come to me with anything. I could yammer on about how different everything […]... Keep Reading

Favorite sex toys EVER

I’ve put hundreds of things on/in/around my genitals, so it means a lot to make it here.

Greatest hits

I’m sure my writing teachers are very proud.

Fun Factory Stronic G pulsator on a slab of white marble.
Four years ago, my G-spot was forever changed by a revolutionary sex toy called the Stronic Eins. Not really a dildo and definitely not a... Keep Reading
Shiri Zinn Cupcake vibrator, and the tools to dismantle the patriarchy. (Fork and knife.)
This sex toy is everything I hate. Cutesy. Twee. Pink. Girly. Symbolic. I want to chuck it into a river. So why am I reviewing it? Oh, I... Keep Reading
Vibratex Princessa standing up on a marble table.
In the past month, I’ve lost the ability to form full sentences. My fingers have forgotten how to type, settling only for clicking and dragging while... Keep Reading
Aneros Evi kegel exerciser on top of a cream-colored knit fabric.
I’m on edge, watching my every move. Like the first day on a new job. Like the feds are after me. Like a driving test.... Keep Reading

Daily dose of snark

When you just need some righteous rage. So, every day?

Ancient Post Randomizer™

I can’t be held responsible for what you find here. I’ve been blogging for over a decade, yo.