Me, masturbating: uh, don’t mind me, I’m just over here jamming this ugly-ass hairbrush-lookin’ thing against my vulva in a feeble attempt to orgasm. And I’m failing, friends. I’m failing and I’m angry. Me, writing: my fingers tingle with impending rage as I hover over the keyboard. I’m looking for a word. Like “disappointing” only meaner. Like “frustrating” but 100 times worse. Abhorrent? Heinous? Exasperating? Disgraceful? Language can’t fail me now, not when so much is at stake. Not when there’s still a possibility that some human on earth might buy the Queen Bee. The Queen Bee is the first vulva-specific vibrator made by Hot Octopuss, a company known for trying to make the word “Guybrator” happen penis toys such as the Pulse. Their products . . . read more
Review: Queen Bee
- December 21, 2018
- Review: Queen Bee
- No Responses
- Sex Toy Reviews, Slush pile, Vibrators
- Tagged with: am I being punked?, buried vibration syndrome, did humans even test this?, Hot Octopuss, movement, orgasm ruiner, oscillating, rechargeable, so. fucking. loud., TPE, unnecessarily trademarked "technology", vag gunk collector, vibrators, vulva hog, wands