“You can always count on Epiphora for her no-holds-barred reviews.” —Tristan Taormino
“Something like the Ars Technica or Wirecutter of adult products.” —VICE
“It’s an invaluable resource, and has done more than anyone realizes to change the conversations around sex toys, sex toy safety, and how we relate to our little friends.” —Violet Blue
Hi! I’m Piph, and I have a very discerning vagina. For over 15 years, I’ve been testing sex toys and writing about them on the internet. Highly trusted and well-known for my snarky yet authentic style, I am the antidote to the coy, euphemistic sugar-coating that plagues bad sex writing. Many loyal readers entrust their future orgasms to me, and I do not take that honor lightly.
Although I’m pretty sure the estimated value of my 900+ sex toy collection could’ve bought me a really fucking nice car if I had different priorities in life, this also means that I have a baseline knowledge of sex toys that very much surpasses that of your friend’s wife. Plus, I’m sometimesa hoot.
As a trusted voice in the sex industry landscape, I’ve been published in Best Sex Writing of the Yearand featured in Playboy, Slate, Mashable, Wirecutter, VICE, The Strategist, Bitch, and Women’s Health. I have shared my expertise as a guest on radio shows and podcasts, a panelist at conferences, and a consultant for sex toy brands. SheVibe made me into a superhero — twice, Kinkly has consistently named me a top sex blogger each year, and I have been featured in prominent books including Objects of Desire and Tristan Taormino’s The Secrets of Great G-Spot Orgasms and Female Ejaculation.
I don’t believe that wishy-washy sex toy reviews benefit anyone. I have my preferences and pet peeves (my hatred for pink and love of VixSkin are no secret), but you will never read a review of mine and question how I truly felt about the toy. Whether I love or hate something, I make it known. You’ll also never see the terms “marital aid” or “battery-operated boyfriend” in my reviews, because euphemisms give me hives. My favorite online shop is SheVibe for many reasons — check out all the things I recommend here.
I’m a queer, feminist labia enthusiast. My jack-off sessions are long and my cups of coffee are doused with creamer. When not kicking a cat off my lap to masturbate, I can be found working on the floor at a local sex toy boutique, making it my personal mission to dissuade everyone from buying the Eva.
If you could only take 3 sex toys to a deserted island…? First of all, I have a nice arsenal of favorites that represent a variety of sensations. BUT IF YOU INSIST, not counting lube, I guess the Magic Wand Rechargeable, Pure Wand, and something made of VixSkin. MAYBE.