There are two big reasons why I hate pink: it’s aesthetically ugly, and I abhor its connotations. Perhaps I find it ugly because of its connotations, but nonetheless, I don’t enjoy looking at it. Hot pink, Pepto Bismol pink, magenta… all of it.
So it’s no surprise that pink runs rampant in the sex toy industry. Take this vibrators section: there are roughly 500 pink toys listed. Purple is a similar number, with blue and black close behind. But green, yellow, and orange (some of the best colors ever, just quietly) are devastatingly underrepresented.
When I was a kid, I got annoyed when people bought me Barbies. A gift of anything Barbie just demonstrated that the gift-giver didn’t know much anything about me. I feel like that’s what the color pink represents to many sex toy manufacturers: the obvious choice. The safe choice. The default.
Maybe I shouldn’t feel patronized, exactly, by the existence of pink sex toys, but… I do. More thought should be put into a sex toy’s color than, “well, this is a toy for women, so pink is perfect. Right, guys?” I imagine a lot of mansplaining goes on in sex toy company boardrooms. And mansplaining does not make me horny.
Like, I really don’t give a fuck if your “sales numbers” tell you women like pink. Because I don’t trust your “sales numbers.” They are based on shitty selection in the first place — pinks and purples. Give us no real choices and you’ll only fulfill your own prophecy.
This epidemic just makes me want to throw up. It’s fucking everywhere and never seems to end.
It’s a sex toy shaped like a goddamn banana, yet someone decided that pink was more appropriate than yellow.
It’s visiting a sex toy shop and feeling like you’ve stepped into the little girls’ section of the department store.
To be clear, I will not refuse an otherwise delicious-looking toy just because it’s pink. However, if I’m on the fence about requesting a toy for review and it only comes in pink, I will probably shun it. If, instead, it comes in green (especially limegreen!), yellow, white, black, turquoise, or orange, I’ll err on the side of yes.
I know that some people out there actually like pink and find it aesthetically pleasing. I cannot fault them, but I’ll never understand them. The thought of liking pink is just incomprehensible to me. At night, alone with just my dildos and my thoughts, I comfort myself by remembering that pink doesn’t truly exist.