We shivered in our seductive outfits. It was October, two days before my birthday, in a damp backyard. Party attendees...
Taylor Swift had two albums to her name. Instagram didn’t exist. We had yet to name our roman empires, show...
updated 12/13! Need more sex toys for your black holes? Behold, my epic guide to the best sex toy deals...
It was a 30th birthday party unlike any other. The invitation read: Luxurious cuddles, siren’s songs, stroking, finger feeding, dancing,...
The world wants to know which household objects can be used as dildos. Pervs have been googling that, pants around...
Lora DiCarlo, the “sex tech” start-up that vowed to revolutionize the pleasure industry and pompously acted like the first to...
Need more sex toys for your black holes? Behold, my epic guide to the best sex toy deals! If you’ve...
It’s my 15th blogging anniversary! Let me whisk you away to Orgasm Island, the only resort in the world that...
Having jacked off to pornographic material for two decades now, I think I’ve earned the title “porn connoisseur.” I’ve been...
Your body is not ready for The Final Member. More than once you will feel a sudden, searing lurch in...
Happy belated Pride to all my queer compadres! I spent June sick with COVID, suffering through gloomy weather (homophobic, Oregon),...
The line between friend and sexual partner became blurred, and yet both were able to coexist in my mind. When...
Today I’m releasing exclusive tapes from last month’s masturbatory adventures. These are my intimate audio notes from out in the...
The pandemic has been a whole new time of giving-zero-fucks, and for me that’s looked like a sort of survivalist...
GOBBLE GOBBLE, peeps. The time has come again, and my yearly tradition is back: a comprehensive list of the best...
Here we are, in the formerly-futuristic year 2021, and it’s been 14 years since I sat in my college dorm...