Today I’m releasing exclusive tapes from last month’s masturbatory adventures. These are my intimate audio notes from out in the...
TODAY IS THE MOTHERFUCKIN’ DAY, PEEPS! The day I’ve been fantasizing about for months — nah, let’s round that up...
In middle school, while others played wall ball, I taught myself basic HTML. I was one of the kids staying...
The memory’s a bit of a blur now, but almost 7 years ago, I was standing in the bathroom at...
The cliché is true — it feels like just yesterday and like forever ago. This week marks 10 years since...
“Holy shit, you masturbate for a living?!” This is how people often respond when I tell them what I do, and...
I never know my name anymore. A few months ago, I was at sex educator friend’s party getting high out...
Most of my summer was spent in the throes of buying a house, an experience that was completely new to...
“Glamorous” is not at all a word I would use to describe my life, yet the world continues thinking my...
For those of you who were unable to attend CatalystCon last weekend, I’m making the panel I was on, “Will...
It’s a simple but horrifying question. Are we, as reviewers, protected from companies that may not like what we have...
This is the 500th post on this here blog. I felt like it needed some sort of commemoration, so I...
So you wanna become a sex toy reviewer. I know, it sounds so glamorous and enticing. Packages bursting with free...
I started this blog 3 years ago with no aspirations. No goals. Not knowing what to tweet about. Not knowing what to...
I’m always getting emails from people wanting to advertise their shit on my site. Only, they never want to pay...
Yes, my friends! The time has come! No longer will you have to slave away on the internets trying to figure out WTF that-one-toy-in-Epiphora’s-header is. No longer will you have to sheepishly email/tweet me and awkwardly try to describe the location of the toy you need identified. I took the...