Jul 052010
 

This is what I call a fucking tease:

Oh, you want to click on the toys? See bigger pictures? Read descriptions? Too bad — YOU CAN’T. This is all you get, loser.

Ah, carrot-dangling at its finest (and most frustrating). Well played, Zini. Well played.

My predictions about each toy’s features:

  • Donut: Dispenses donuts after use
  • Namison: Makes car racing sounds as you thrust
  • Seed & Bud: Impregnates you with vibrator robot babies — with no option to disable impregnation
  • Chu: Coos at you and laughs at your jokes by saying “LOL”
  • Psi: Doubles as a kitchen device for cracking nuts and stirring shit (…with your mind)

While we wait for August to roll around, friends, any thoughts on what these crazy, awesome-looking contraptions might be?

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