Jun 172014
 

BS Atelier Wild Stripes silicone dildo (large)Finally, a manufacturer is going balls-to-the-wall with their silicone sex toy designs — and I love how flamboyant and playful they are. Spanish company BS Atelier makes a dildo for everyone: one for vegans and/or those who miss Gateway computer boxes, one for horror fans, another for people who like to splatter paint, and even one for that dude who keeps his socks on during sex.

I chose none of those dildos. I chose the uncategorizable Wild Stripes, which is striped diagonally with black, white, orange, pink, purple, red, and grey. I chose it solely based on how attractive it was. Shape was, honestly, secondary in my mind.

Yet, as much as I prefer things that go in my vagina to be aesthetically pleasing — that’s kinda the door (labia?) policy — it isn’t enough here.

The Wild Stripes dildo comes in a heavy duty plastic bag reminiscent of astronaut ice cream or croutons, complete with tear-off, resealable top. Inside is a tiny folded up manual and a packet of Yes water-based lube. The instrucciones read, in part:

For a greater satisfaction them should be used with watery-based lubricants . . . Silicone is a very resistant material, if kept them in a place without dust and far from objects that could scratch them, the BS dildoes and pluggeds will last many years.

The pluggeds! They can last many years!

Actually, the manual is pretty useful. It even recommends using a condom if going from anal to vaginal penetration — “it is not sufficient to wash them,” it states. Accurate.

But, as adorable as this dildo and its manual are, I feel uncomfortable with the $90 price tag attached. The Wild Stripes just doesn’t deliver in the sensation department, and I’m somewhat wary about its construction.

It seems silly to quibble about the finish on a dildo, but… it looks… scuffed? Like a gym floor? And it has several nicks in the silicone that I didn’t put there. This dildo is not glossy like a Tantus toy. It’s not silky like a Fun Factory toy. It’s not flawless like a LELO toy. The silicone is draggy, and the finish is imperfect. I get the sense that, as a new company, BS still needs to refine the art of dildo-making.

This would be easier to overlook if I liked the way the dildo feels in use, but I don’t. It attempts to go for the flat tip G-spotting shape that I love in the LELO Ella and PicoBong Moka, but it’s a half-assed attempt. The edges are too rounded to do much of anything wondrous for me. It kind of feels like a shapeless blob, especially in comparison to other toys. And the silicone drags at my vaginal opening, requiring more and more lube as I go.

Around the same time that I got the Wild Stripes, I acquired the similarly-shaped Pleasure Works Siren, and it was impossible not to compare the two — and crown the Siren the winner. The Siren is shiny and its shape has more definition, so it glides well and hits my G-spot more readily. It also costs $40 less than the Wild Stripes; it’s just not particularly pretty.

I’d venture to guess most people don’t have $90 to burn on a dildo that looks great on a shelf but only halfway succeeds in its function as a sex toy. The small BS toys aren’t as expensive, though, and for folks who prefer lighter and gentler G-spot stimulation, they can be great. Lorax also likes the Alex style, so not all hope is lost.

But the Wild Stripes is just too imprecise to do anything worthwhile for my vagina. If you want a silicone dildo that feels really awesome and that you can show off to your partner’s parents when they come over for dinner, get a tie-dye Mustang, the Tantus Splash, or Jollies Jollet. They’ll be impressed with your quality taste in dildos, and you’ll get immense rather than mediocre pleasure. Win/win.

Thank you, SheVibe!

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