Review: Fascinator Shag Throe

A waterproof sex blanket that will make you disown towels forever.

Liberator Fascinator Shag Throe close-up, with droplets of water all over it.
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A while back, after I learned to squirt, I pleaded for someone, anyone, to buy me a Liberator Fascinator Throe. My juices were soaking through the towels I put down, through the comforter, onto the bed sheets. I was frantic, wanting to explore the world of squirting but not wanting to have to wash the sheets after every exploration. Luckily, I didn’t have to suffer long — my amazing and extremely generous friend bought a black microfiber Throe for me.

I am very fortunate in that I have spent very few sex/masturbation sessions without my Throe. Sure, my boyfriend and I had taken to putting a towel under my ass while we had sex, but that was okay. The squirting was another matter, and a much messier one. The Throe changed all of that. It allowed me to squirt more often and with no fear. Now, I chose the shag Throe to review. Yes, a virtual duplicate of the product I already had. That should tell you a lot.

My first Throe was a microfiber one, so one side of it is made of velvety microfiber. This time, I wanted a shag Throe. You guessed it: faux fur. Both have the same satin layer with a waterproof coating on the other side. Both, of course, are lined on the inside with a (somewhat crinkly) moisture barrier. Both are awesome, but the shag Throe is my favorite.

The Throe is five by six feet, so it takes up most of my queen-sized bed. Either side can be used as the “action side.” I prefer the faux fur side, but the satin side would be a good choice on a hot day. The microfiber version has the advantage of playing very well with Liberator shapes, which are faced in microfiber. Thus, draping the microfiber Throe over my Ramp/Wedge ensures that the Throe will not slip away. But, despite this, I find the shag Throe far more alluring. Microfiber is prone to static and just doesn’t feel especially nice to lay upon; faux fur feels soft and luxurious.

The Throe is invaluable to me for its waterproof properties alone. Everyone who squirts or has messy sex should own at least one. It will make you disown towels forever.

The Throe is not thick or padded, which is why it is hard to believe, at first, that it is capable of catching and absorbing considerable amounts of liquid. Well, it does. Let me tell you, it does. It has no problem with my ejaculate, but I decided to do an extreme test and pour three cups of water (which, wow, is a lot of water) on it. Although the water pooled fiercely, the carpet underneath was bone dry. Ladies and gentlemen, this blanket is nuts.

As life-changing as the Throe is, however, there are some things it just can’t do. It can’t become a towel; wiping my lubed up fingers on it does not sufficiently clean them. It can’t absorb copious amounts of liquid quickly — the liquid just pools there and very, very slowly sinks into the fabric. It also can’t dry quickly, so wet spots stay wet (and, often, cold). And the Throe doesn’t stay in one place. Especially during sex, it crumples up and slides around. For this reason, I prefer it during solo sessions, and it works surprisingly well draped over my desk chair.

When to wash the Throe is personal preference; I tend to slack about it because the instructions read “Machine wash cold. Dry low heat.” For someone who has to scrounge up quarters to even use the washer and dryer, this is bad news. Low heat isn’t going to dry anything else that one could throw into the load; plus, I worry about leaving the Throe in the dryer too long. Instead, I opt to save the $1 and hang the Throe over the shower rod after washing it. This takes planning ahead, since it needs to dry overnight.

Despite these issues, the Throe is invaluable to me for its waterproof properties alone. Everyone who squirts or has messy sex should own at least one. It will make you disown towels forever. One bit of advice, though: don’t leave the Throe out if cats are present, otherwise they will find it, plant themselves on it, and be too adorable to remove.

Get the Throe (usually the newer velvish one) at SheVibe (best selection), Spectrum BoutiqueSmitten Kitten, Good Vibes, Passionfruit (AU/NZ), or Liberator directly.