Feb 092010

There are a lot of vibrators in the world, but few that charge via USB. That’s why I wanted the Xtassie Cocomini. Okay, that and it comes in freaking TURQUOISE. Who can argue with turquoise? Well, it turns out even turquoise and a USB port can’t save a mediocre vibrator.

The Cocomini is packaged in a cute purse-shaped green and black box. It comes with a flimsy white drawstring pouch that is not only fairly transparent, but does not stay closed at all (the moment I let go of the strings, the neck of the pouch relaxes completely). It also comes with a manual in 500 languages and a 4.5″ A/Mini-B USB cable. The tiny Mini-B side of the cable is what plugs into the toy itself.

The Cocomini is cactus-shaped; the bigger prong has buttons on it, while the smaller prong has a removable cap with a tiny USB port inside. The Cocomini is made of plastic — mine has a slick finish, but it also comes in different colors, some with a brushed aluminum style finish. It’s 4.8″ long and .78″ in diameter, and there’s a fugly Xtassie logo on the side (really? A wine glass for an i? That’s kind of terrible). There’s also a prominent seam that runs the length of the toy.

When it first arrived, my Cocomini needed to only be charged for 15 minutes before it was full, but normally it charges for two hours. There’s a light surrounding the buttons that turns orange while charging, and green when the charge is complete. Supposedly it lasts up to four hours on a single charge, but there’s no way I’m going to spend four hours with it on my clit, so we’ll never know.

Yeah, that’s right. The Cocomini is not a toy that I will be getting off with anytime soon ever. It’s too weak, it’s too rounded, and I can feel the seam. I’ve never really felt a seam on my clit before, and it’s not an experience I’d like to repeat. To top things off, the buttons are hard to push. And the cactus shape isn’t ergonomic; it’s just weird.

The thing is, Cocomini has very specific competition, since there is only one other USB-rechargeable clit stimulator: the LELO Mia. I don’t particularly care for Mia (edit: there’s an updated Mia that I like!), but next to the Cocomini, it starts to look pretty damn good. Mia is slightly more pointed, doesn’t have a seam, and by my estimation, is stronger than the Cocomini. Do you need more reasons? Okay:

  • The Cocomini has a tiny, tiny cap that goes over its USB port. Easy to lose? I think so. Mia has a cap as well, but it’s larger, and allows for the toy to plug straight into a computer, rather than via a cable.
  • Mia has about seven vibration speeds and three patterns; the Cocomini has three speeds and four patterns.
  • The Cocomini doesn’t lock for travel. Mia does.

Do you see where I’m going with this? If you really want a USB-powered vibrator, get the LELO Mia. The poor cactus Cocomini, even as it capitalizes on my obsession with computers and the color turquoise, is still just another weak vibrator in the crowd.

  • Aww, boo. As soon as I saw the color I liked it. Not to mention I’m always on the lookout for rechargeable vibes. I mean, it’s just easier!!! It stinks that this isn’t as great as it looks.

  • carnivalesq


    I’m sad tho. I wish a turq usb toy would kick ass because the review would be EPIC.

  • Sundae

    Ah what a disappointment! I like the idea of USB toys because they are so versatile and I don’t need an adaptor to charge them, but from the sounds of things they wouldn’t have the punch I need. I kind of don’t understand the weird cactus shape on this one either – it seems unnecessary and bizarre.

  • @Sundae: Yeah, I think the shape was designed so that the USB port and buttons would have different places to go, but it’s weird.

  • As much as my geeky side loves the idea of USB chargeable toys seeing this toy immediately makes me go ‘bleh’; I usually try not to judge toys just because they don’t look…very nice but this one just looks…goofy. A lot of people talk about toys like the Eroscillator and how strange or ugly it looks (which I totally disagree with but it’s just an example) but it’s one of the best-loved toys around. Case in point: looks aren’t everything. But not only is this thing not very aesthetically appealing, it’s also, according to your review, weak and overpriced. Bleh, I say, bleh. Hopefully USB chargeable toys will evolve and they’ll make a decent one. Great review!

  • I was curious about these. Too bad..

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  • Michele

    Well I *was* interested when I first saw the picture, but it sounds like the only thing this has going for it is the fact that it’s turquoise!

  • Selective Sensualist

    I have yet to see a USB-charging toy that intrigues me enough to buy it.

  • Bri

    Hmmm, no. This is cute (sort of) and pretty (yay for turquoise vibes!) but no thank you.

  • Liz

    that’s really kind of an adorable shape, and the color is really pretty, but i dunno, i don’t really care for the notion of charging a vibrator in my computer. hell, i hate charging my iPod because it gets in the way.

    i do like the packaging, though. man, i love great packaging.

  • A seam on your clit. Umm. No thanks.
    Plus I don’t really see the big deal of having a vibe that charges via the computer. Maybe it’s because I don’t leave my computer on long enough or maybe it because I’d rather just plug it into the wall in the bedroom & my desk top is in the living room.

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  • thank you.

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