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  • Reviews
    Reviews

    The bread and butter of this blog: sex toy reviews! Want to browse my reviews in a different way? Check out my Toybox, consult my list of tags, or jump to the worst stuff I’ve tried or my favorites.

    Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

    Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal. Cassette player lying in the grass, surrounded by sex toys and Epiphora-labeled cassette tapes.

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Review: We-Vibe Touch X + Tango X

    Dame Kip and Pom rechargeable silicone bullet vibrators

    Review: Dame Kip and Pom

  • Guides
    Guides

    Let me teach you things! Such as how to become a savvy sex toy shopper and avoid sex toys that will poison you.

    Me holding the Lovehoney Flash and Doxy Don, demonstrating the way one moves much more visibly than the other (and thus is much rumblier).

    Buzzy vs. rumbly: the most important aspect of a vibrator

    A selection of toxic sex toys. They smell like beach balls.

    Your genitals deserve better: the case against toxic sex toys

    Epiphora’s best and worst sex toys of 2018

    September 2014: Ejaculate all over my leg and soaked through a towel from the njoy Pure Wand.

    How I know squirting is real (and also not pee)

    Colorful vibrators and kegel balls surrounded by iridescent curly ribbons.

    Epiphora’s sex toy gift-giving guide

  • Banter
    Banter

    Ramblings, usually about sex toys, sometimes about my gaping vagina, sometimes about sex-related falsehoods perpetuated by the media. Notable subcategories include Disingenuous Assholes and True Life: I’m A Sex Toy Reviewer.

    Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

    Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

    Porn gems: playful domination & fireside fucking

    A hand caressing the tattooed leg of a person wearing a strap-on: the New York Collective Shilo dildo.

    Queer sex party chronicles: every night a blank slate

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal. Cassette player lying in the grass, surrounded by sex toys and Epiphora-labeled cassette tapes.

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

  • New here?
    • Get directions!
    • Greatest hits
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  • Toybox
  • All-time faves
  • Buy toys
    Buy toys
    Dildos on display, courtesy of Early to Bed, one of my favorite indie sex shops.

    Epiphora-approved sex toy shops

    Various sex toys laid out on a grey table next to a rainbow blanket, with hang tags displaying handwritten prices.

    Sex toy sales, deals, and promos

    Finn Carson and Calvin Banks kissing, on CockyBoys

    Epiphora-approved porn

  • FAQ
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A hand caressing the tattooed leg of a person wearing a strap-on: the New York Collective Shilo dildo.
Anyway How's Your Sex Life?BanterGreatest HitsShenanigansSunshine & Rainbows

Queer sex party chronicles: every night a blank slate

May 26, 2022
The line between friend and sexual partner became blurred, and yet both were able to coexist in my mind. When... Keep Reading
Anyway How's Your Sex Life?BanterGreatest HitsShenanigansSunshine & Rainbows

Queer sex party chronicles: hi, I’m new here

September 23, 2021
The party would change my life, but I didn’t know it yet. I went to the wrong house at first.... Keep Reading
Where vibrators are born: my trip to Fun Factory in Bremen, Germany!
"The Industry"BanterShenanigansSunshine & RainbowsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

Where vibrators are born: my trip to Fun Factory in Bremen, Germany!

September 25, 2020
Fun Factory has been a trailblazer in the sex toy industry since their inception. They utilized silicone from the get-go,... Keep Reading
A decade of sex blogging. Cupcake butt plug and Shilo.
Anyway How's Your Sex Life?BanterBlogger LyfeBreak Out the TissuesGreatest HitsShenanigansSunshine & RainbowsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

A decade of sex blogging

October 12, 2017
The cliché is true — it feels like just yesterday and like forever ago. This week marks 10 years since... Keep Reading
Typewriter, cup of pens, and some sex books. The sparkly "Epiphora" drink cozy on the cup was a gift from Bianca (TheVenusEmporium on Etsy). The other side has a vulva on it!
BanterBlogger LyfeBreak Out the TissuesGreatest HitsTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

A sex blogger by any other name

September 3, 2016
I never know my name anymore. A few months ago, I was at sex educator friend’s party getting high out... Keep Reading
Sex toy temporary tattoos and the lengths we go through to photograph them. Photo by Kate Sinclaire.
BanterBreak Out the TissuesGreatest HitsShenanigansTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

Together, we form one fully functional human

July 4, 2015
7 sex bloggers were standing outside a glass blowing studio. We’d been waiting for an hour and there was no sign... Keep Reading
Bouquet of hand drawn sex toys.
Anyway How's Your Sex Life?BanterBreak Out the TissuesGreatest HitsShenanigansSunshine & Rainbows

Friends who have sex with each other

July 12, 2014
Kynan greets me at the airport with a bouquet of hand-drawn sex toys. Eleven toys, all of them my favorites,... Keep Reading
My new blog sponsors' logos
April Fool's!

Say hi to my new sponsors!

April 1, 2014
Being a niche blog, and one dedicated to something that a percentage of inhabitants of earth refuse to even talk... Keep Reading
A bunch of dirtied sex toys lying on a paper towel (on which I've scribbled notes).
FeaturesJack-off Journal

Jack-off Journal #17

March 28, 2014
May 17th, 2013 The boyfriend went to the convenience store for beer, and Survivor was downloading at a snails’ pace, so... Keep Reading
Various logos: CatalystCon, SheVibe, Sex Out Loud Radio
Announcements

CatalystCon East: sponsorship, a panel, and… a live studio audience

January 25, 2014
You may have heard — I’m going to CatalystCon East again this year. What you may not know, and should know,... Keep Reading
Dildos among the smorgasbord, at a party.
BanterShenanigansTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

When sex bloggers party

January 5, 2014
Yes, we play with dildos, but not in the way you think… View this post on Instagram A post shared... Keep Reading
Lorax, me, and Queerie Bradshaw showing off our special conference manicures on top of some Tantus stickers.
BanterShenanigansTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

I can’t sum up CatalystCon

November 12, 2013
It began in the airport, with my iced coffee in tow, and two war vets grumbling to each other about... Keep Reading
That cat is totally enthused about the dildos surrounding him. That's his enthusiasm face.
BanterSunshine & Rainbows

The best birthday presents

October 25, 2013
Today, I am 27. I have come to expect very little from people over the years, but Ashley Manta took... Keep Reading
"500" made out of vibrators and dildos. CRAFTY.
BanterBlogger LyfeBreak Out the TissuesMaking Progress

Five hundred

June 11, 2013
This is the 500th post on this here blog. I felt like it needed some sort of commemoration, so I... Keep Reading
CatalystCon swag bag. Apparently Wet makes a lube called Uranus.
BanterShenanigansTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

The amazing things that happened at CatalystCon

March 20, 2013
IT’S ALREADY OVER. Who’s surprised, though, really? Catalyst was bound to go by in the blink of an eye. Even... Keep Reading
A grid of my fancy business cards laid out on the floor.
Announcements

Armed and ready for Catalyst

March 11, 2013
You guys, CatalystCon is happening. Like, really soon. In just a couple days, I will be traveling alone for the... Keep Reading
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Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday!

Epiphora's orgasmic getaway giveaway! ($1,500 grand prize, 80+ prizes)

Orgasmic getaway giveaway! ($1,500 grand prize, 80+ prizes)

Porn gems: playful domination & fireside fucking

Movie Night: The Final Member

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