Nov 142012

[Update: I reviewed it!]

I like thrusting, if you haven’t noticed, so I am drawn to this new majig from Fun Factory. The Stronic Eins, or Stronic One, is the first in a series of three toys in the “Pulsator” family. It has 10 different rhythms, ranging from long and slow to short and rapid. Awkwardly, the verb Fun Factory should probably be using is thrust, but they keep using pulsate, a word we’ve been using for years to refer to a certain type of vibration pattern. But this toy doesn’t vibrate at all:

A whole new kind of stimulation — instead of vibrating, this new kind of toy pulsates with powerful waves which deliver a real treat especially at the lowest frequencies. The powerful, naturalistic pulses are strong, unique but familiar as well. The innovative motor technology, in which solid metal moves in a hollow body, produces a pulsating, deep and thrusting rhythm.

The Pulsator line has been in development for 18 months (two babies!), and according to this press release, 87 percent of testers preferred the Pulsators to regular vibrators. Somehow I doubt that, but anyway, Fun Factory has produced this super-hip teaser video for the line, which mostly just makes the toys look like Shake Weights:

You know what I already love, though? That this isn’t a rabbit. Of course, it’s being billed as a dual stimulator, as Fun Factory is wont to do with its usual paltry protruding nubs, but everyone knows the truth.

Almost every single other “thrusting” vibrator in history has been a questionable rabbit made of rubber, TPR, or jelly. The shafts also tend to look like air mattress pumps. Reviews on the thrusting functions on these toys have been mixed, from “actually alright, a lot better than I imagined it would be” to “weak and frustrating […] pretty much pointless” to “absolutely fantastic.”

For a while, I thought I wanted one of Cal Exotic’s various “passion wave” toys, with their rolling wave motions, but then I decided not to stoop. Now I really don’t have to. (Sidenote: I dare you to watch the video for the Passion Wave Teaser directly after watching the Fun Factory video above. It is an appalling juxtaposition.)

Eschewing the fact that Fun Factory calls this toy a “womanizer” and claims that it “simulates the natural movements of lovemaking” (because that is ALL THAT VIBRATORS SHOULD DO! MIMIC HETERO MARRIED LOVEMAKING!), and that it only comes in purple and fucking pink, and that it’s gonna cost like $200… I want it. The way this thing writhes, it’s either going to be awesome — or a complete disaster. Always the sex toy masochist, I must find out which it is.

Get the Stronic of your choice (*cough* Eins) at SheVibe, Good Vibes, Babeland, Pleasure Chest,
Fun Factory, Smitten KittenLovehoney (international), or Come As You Are (Canada).

  • This looks bizarre… I have no idea how to feel about it.

  • Hello,

    I received the Stronic a few days ago. I must say the feeling is quite interesting.

    On the first try, I wasn’t convinced at all. I was quite surprised, and not especially in a good way. I just threw it aside, and grabbed my Smart Wand instead.

    Then I tried it again, and I kind of enjoyed it. In fact, I find it quite efficient for G-spot stimulation. But it doesn’t stimulate my clit. At all. It doesn’t even touch it. But it is great when used with a clitoral stimulator.

    The Stronic seems to contain some kind of small metal ball (seems to me quite similar to what a pair of geisha balls contains, but of course, I didn’t open it to check that point), that moves and makes the sextoy “pulsate”.

    (Sorry for my approximate English, I’m French 🙂 )

  • I am incredibly interested here. I love thrusting but my arms are short and my torso is long. My poor little T-Rex arms get tired and frustrated trying to thrust vigourously for as long as it takes for me to reach orgasm. I’ve yet to acheive squirting but I’m hoping that with the addition of this toy to my collection, I can get enough G-spot stimulation for it to happen.

  • I feel like this is something I will have to see to understand. it could be amazing or an utter disappointment. also be glad you didn’t get a passion wave stimulator. they are terrible. The giant red one might be different, I don’t know, because it frightened me too much to even remove it from its packaging. I tried the rabbit version of the one you linked. I couldn’t feel the waves, it smelled awful, and if you clenched in the slightest, it full on stopped.

  • The red one:
    maybe after testing the T-Rex you look at the 1 3/4 inch diameter and say, “P’shaw.” But trust me, it makes an impact in person, as this bright red monstrosity. Not to mention immediate turn-off due to the fact that YOU CAN SMELL IT THROUGH THE PACKAGING! (Which was cardboard by the way.)

  • Kira

    I’m really excited about this! The shape looks great, but the thrusting sounds super interesting. I wish the video showed more of the thrusting and less weird cut away shots. 🙁

  • My boyfriend read this and asked me (completely serious), “Are Shake Weights sex toys?” I directed him to the video, and he was just so full of second-hand embarrassment.

    Anyways, can’t wait for this toy…or rather, can’t wait for the review! These do look interesting.

  • Frankie

    You’ll do a video review for this, right? Since the promo showed NOTHING about the supposed thrusting.

  • I could certainly do a video demonstrating the thrusting.

  • Atroquinine

    I saw this thing on the site I’m reviewing for and I hope to god I get to try it. I can’t fork out the cash to legit buy one, but I’m very, VERY interested.

  • Neurogasm

    I found a video of the toy in action here: which is unfortunately accompanied by piano music so you can’t hear how loud it is. Gives me a better idea of how it works than the two-point-five seconds the commercial shows. Makes me want it despite wondering if it’ll be as gratingly textured as the G4 line was.

  • My Stronic smells like raspberries. It’s not a bad smell, but it’s quite weird. I’m still wondering why it smells like this, and if all of them have the same smell, or if it’s just mine, or my nose.

  • Ben

    That teaser video just got so much better – I had playing in a background tab by accident (never mind the lyrics) 🙂

  • thermionic

    Anyone speak German? Here are two videos where it’s being discussed in detail.

  • Emma

    I had a go at watching these as I speak some German, but I’m pretty sure they’re actually in Danish. It’s somewhat similar and I got some of the gist, but more from the gesturing than anything. The second video shows the toy better I think and shows/talks a bit about the functions.

  • the others i’ve tried featuring a “thrusting” motion all broke within 3 or 4 uses- and they don’t come wth warranties. And they look pretty stupid. This one looks promising but the price tag puts me off……..

  • Liz

    If the music in that video wasn’t inspired by Aphex Twin, I don’t know what the world is anymore. That video was crazy trendy.

  • I have been so let down by FunFactory lately, that I’m kinda eye-rolling at this. I also wonder about what this will be like to hold for usage? Or maybe other people can let stuff just hang out in the vag. I sure as heck can’t- I broke a lamp not long ago when I tried to let a dildo just hang out in there and instead my vag decided to launch it clear across the room. Hm.

  • Part of me is thinking, “I must have this. Now.” The other part of me is worried that it will be one of those highly praised toys that ends up being a complete disappointment. Well, I guess there’s just one way to find out, right?

  • Valentijn

    Went to a toystore the other day, and they had this little fella already stocked. I got a little demonstration from the shop owner.

    When turned on, it felt completely different than vibrations. Like what ‘Piph said, it ‘thrusts’. I think this can work out to ways: either it is epic, and everybody loves it, or it fails epically. I’ll let you know as soon as I know more!

  • Valentijn

    You are right, it’s most likely Danish. I am sure as one can be that this isn’t German (since I speak German fluently), but doubting whether the hostess is speaking Danish or Swedish. Those languages got much in common.

    Since there is a Danish URL in the description, that is the most likely option 🙂

  • Valentijn

    I got a demonstration of this vibe; am I correct that one cannot change the intensity, but only the pattern?

    La vie est belle!

  • Joseph

    I just want to say the video of the ad is very creative, aha ~

  • Skade

    They’re both Danish 🙂

  • Destiny Cat

    I.think ill my silicone dong thanks. this thing looks intimidating

  • Hi ! Correct, it has 10 patterns, but no way to change the intensity.

  • Person

    This I have seen and is amazing I’m getting one in a few weeks and I’m very excited I have one on display at the store I work at the 3 people I sold it to said that they loved it so I have high hopes for this one

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