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plastic

I hope you know what plastic is.

The Jimmyjane Rumble Seat, a white plastic toilet-looking chair with a grey vibrating bump on top, standing in front of my sex toy closet.
Greatest HitsSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Rumble Seat

When you arrive at the sex party and present the guests with your vibrating sex chair, you don’t exactly want...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Mia

Here is who I am: I got very excited when I received a 2GB jumpdrive as a gift. I anxiously...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Be Be

It’s not every day you receive a postcard along with a sex toy. Along with a packet of materials explaining...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Tera Patrick’s Super Charged Magnum

I know packaging doesn’t matter, but sometimes I just can’t ignore the hilarity of it. Check out this piece of...
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Bubble Love pleasure jet and Dilly dildo attachment on an old boat dock.
Air Flow, Thrusters & MovementGreatest HitsSex Toy Reviews

Review: Bubble Love

I am one of many who grew up getting my orgasms from the bathtub faucet. Legs spread, back against the...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Crystal Candy G-Licious

The Crystal Candy G-Licious came in a transparent plastic box that looked like it belonged in the little girls’ aisle...
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Review: Sydnee’s Elegant Endeavor

I never thought of masturbation as “elegant,” nor have I ever described it as an “endeavor.” Perhaps if my experience with...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Goddess Platinum Massager

I am ever on the lookout for any toy that resembles the love of my life, the Xtreme Pack G-spot...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Bcurious

The Bswish Bcurious, which is quite humorously one letter away from being called the “Bicurious,” joins a small, tight-knit family...
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GiveawaysHi, I love youSex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: We-Vibe Touch X + Tango X

Is it a sign things are finally looking up? Fuck, I’ll take anything. A pair of legendary vibrators, cult classics,...
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California Exotics Turbo Glider
BanterHi, I love youSex Toy ReviewsToybox ReportsVibrators

Love letter to the Turbo Glider

Dearest Turbo Glider, Hello, my dear. It’s been a while, I know. A few trysts here and there, but things...
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Greatest HitsSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: OhMiBod

I knew the OhMiBod was a shoddy piece of crap from the get-go. I just didn’t have quite enough justification...
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Sex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Her Perfect Fit

A somewhat bored-looking, lingerie-clad woman stares back at me from her position atop Her Perfect Fit. Three cute icons at...
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We-Vibe Tango rechargeable bullet vibrator in a wooden bowl full of seashells.
Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Tango

Dude, man, guys, shit, dawg. Everyone loves the We-Vibe Tango. I’m totally late to the party. Then again, I was...
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BanterToybox Reports

Discontinued? No reviews? I should know better.

The Impulse Fantasy Kit was supposed to be the answer to my need for more power than the Xtreme Pack...
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California Exotics Turbo Glider
Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Turbo Glider

I stumbled upon the Turbo Glider whilst on the hunt for an inexpensive vibe that wouldn’t fall apart or die...
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Illustration of Epiphora

Hi, I’m Piph, and I have a very discerning vagina.

For over 15 years, I’ve been testing sex toys and writing about them on the internet.

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Very fave sex shops

SheVibe: my all-time fave, with a selection that will blow your brains out Spectrum Boutique: a hip, modern sex shop dedicated to body-safe toys and radical inclusion Lovehoney: the best place to shop for international orders

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Latest posts

Epiphora's best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday!

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday! (2024)

Me wearing my harness with the Vixen Creations Leo dildo inside, an orange dildo with a bat pattern.

Queer sex party chronicles: pumpkin spice orgy

Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool's retrospective

Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool’s retrospective

Epiphora's Black Friday sex toy sales and deals!

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday! (2023)

A circle of people wearing harnesses and dildos, arranged in a circle and shot from above. Dildos pointing into the middle.

Queer sex party chronicles: a magical birthday

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Greatest Hits

Wobbling Willy, a magenta dildo with a bobble head attached.

What, you don’t want a dildo with your boyfriend’s face on it?

Lovehoney Flash USB rechargeable vibrator on top of a dictionary, open to the definition of "buzzy."

Review: Flash

Scare-tactic G-spot headlines complete with stock photos of women and feet.

An abridged guide to decoding horseshit articles about the G-spot

Jimmyjane Form 5 and Hello Touch X vibrators (plus masking tape labels) next to some fall leaves.

Review: Form 5 + Hello Touch X

Typewriter, cup of pens, and some sex books. The sparkly "Epiphora" drink cozy on the cup was a gift from Bianca (TheVenusEmporium on Etsy). The other side has a vulva on it!

A sex blogger by any other name

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