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  • Reviews
    Reviews

    The bread and butter of this blog: sex toy reviews! Want to browse my reviews in a different way? Check out my Toybox, consult my list of tags, or jump to the worst stuff I’ve tried or my favorites.

    A basket of fruit and vegetables (carrot, cucumber, yam, corn, bunch of bananas) in the grass, on top of a tea towel with the word "MASTURBATION" on it.

    Produce fucking: which fruit or veggie makes the best dildo?

    Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

    Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal. Cassette player lying in the grass, surrounded by sex toys and Epiphora-labeled cassette tapes.

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Review: We-Vibe Touch X + Tango X

  • Guides
    Guides

    Let me teach you things! Such as how to become a savvy sex toy shopper and avoid sex toys that will poison you.

    Me holding the Lovehoney Flash and Doxy Don, demonstrating the way one moves much more visibly than the other (and thus is much rumblier).

    Buzzy vs. rumbly: the most important aspect of a vibrator

    A selection of toxic sex toys. They smell like beach balls.

    Your genitals deserve better: the case against toxic sex toys

    Epiphora’s best and worst sex toys of 2018

    September 2014: Ejaculate all over my leg and soaked through a towel from the njoy Pure Wand.

    How I know squirting is real (and also not pee)

    Colorful vibrators and kegel balls surrounded by iridescent curly ribbons.

    Epiphora’s sex toy gift-giving guide

  • Banter
    Banter

    Ramblings, usually about sex toys, sometimes about my gaping vagina, sometimes about sex-related falsehoods perpetuated by the media. Notable subcategories include Disingenuous Assholes and True Life: I’m A Sex Toy Reviewer.

    Me wearing my harness with the Vixen Creations Leo dildo inside, an orange dildo with a bat pattern.

    Queer sex party chronicles: pumpkin spice orgy

    Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool's retrospective

    Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool’s retrospective

    A circle of people wearing harnesses and dildos, arranged in a circle and shot from above. Dildos pointing into the middle.

    Queer sex party chronicles: a magical birthday

    A basket of fruit and vegetables (carrot, cucumber, yam, corn, bunch of bananas) in the grass, on top of a tea towel with the word "MASTURBATION" on it.

    Produce fucking: which fruit or veggie makes the best dildo?

    Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

    Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

  • New here?
    • Get directions!
    • Greatest hits
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  • Toybox
  • All-time faves
  • Buy toys
    Buy toys
    Dildos on display, courtesy of Early to Bed, one of my favorite indie sex shops.

    Epiphora-approved sex toy shops

    Various sex toys laid out on a grey table next to a rainbow blanket, with hang tags displaying handwritten prices.

    Sex toy sales, deals, and promos

    Finn Carson and Calvin Banks kissing, on CockyBoys

    Epiphora-approved porn

  • FAQ
  • Random

vibrators

All posts tagged “vibrators.” Usually, reviews of vibrators. So there’s a lot here, because my life has been dedicated to vibrators.

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  • Latest
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Hi, I love youSex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Impulse Kit Bunny Arouser

July 13, 2009
The Impulse Kit Bunny Arouser looks like a joke: a plastic, slightly pointed pink bullet with a TPR bunny-shaped sleeve. It...
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Pop ShotsSex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Pop Shot: Astrea I vibrating brief

June 26, 2009
The Astrea I vibrating panties are “one size fits most,” which of course means “one size fits size small.” It cuts...
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Sex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Treeze Wave

June 24, 2009
I used to hold to the unfounded belief that making any material vibrate would be an accomplishment. Trying the Don Wands...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: iVibe Egg

June 23, 2009
Sure, bullet/egg vibes rule. They’re tiny and portable and made for the clit. In a way, they’re all bound to...
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Sex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Waterproof Slender Probe

June 20, 2009
There’s only so much you can say about a $20 plastic vibrator, and so I won’t say much. The Waterproof...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Sublime

June 9, 2009
A while back, I wrote up a post entitled “Cal Exotic inches toward integrity,” which detailed the new and hilariously...
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Greatest HitsSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: OhMiBod

May 30, 2009
I knew the OhMiBod was a shoddy piece of crap from the get-go. I just didn’t have quite enough justification...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Be Be

May 29, 2009
It’s not every day you receive a postcard along with a sex toy. Along with a packet of materials explaining...
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Giveaways

Xtreme Pack G-spot bullet winner!

April 11, 2009
I received nearly 30 entries to my contest to win the Epiphora-approved Xtreme Pack G-spot bullet, making this contest my...
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Sex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Impulse Butterfly

April 5, 2009
Don’t ask me why I had to try a strap-on vibrator. I’m ashamed to admit that I ever thought it...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Benjamin Bond

March 22, 2009
When I began reviewing sex toys, my vagina was the biggest wimp. I was still a virgin, after all, and...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Xtreme Kit

March 22, 2009
I’ve been curious for a while now about the Xtreme Kit. I am unabashed in my creepy allegiance to the...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Acuvibe Mini

March 7, 2009
I’m going to say it: the Hitachi Magic Wand and I are not very close. I completely understand the appeal,...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Twister

March 6, 2009
I’m a sucker for sex toys that come in any shade of green. They’re difficult to come by. The Fun...
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Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Goddess Platinum Massager

February 8, 2009
I am ever on the lookout for any toy that resembles the love of my life, the Xtreme Pack G-spot...
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LELO Gigi rechargeable G-spot vibrator
Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Gigi

January 31, 2009
Recently, I’ve been caught up in a passionate love and squirting affair with Ella, LELO’s pure silicone double-ended dildo with...
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Latest posts

Epiphora's best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday!

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday! (2024)

Me wearing my harness with the Vixen Creations Leo dildo inside, an orange dildo with a bat pattern.

Queer sex party chronicles: pumpkin spice orgy

Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool's retrospective

Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool’s retrospective

Epiphora's Black Friday sex toy sales and deals!

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday! (2023)

A circle of people wearing harnesses and dildos, arranged in a circle and shot from above. Dildos pointing into the middle.

Queer sex party chronicles: a magical birthday

Recent comments

Greatest Hits

Slice of rainbow pride cake necklaces on a tie-dye fabric

The things we’ve built

Jimmyjane Form 5 and Hello Touch X vibrators (plus masking tape labels) next to some fall leaves.

Review: Form 5 + Hello Touch X

Pipedream Ceramix No. 4 ceramic dildo

Review: Ceramix No. 4

The Eroscillator standing proudly on a table, with the Ultra Soft Fingertip attachment (marshmallow) on it.

Review: Eroscillator

Spareparts Hardwear Joque harness as modeled by the lovely Penny and Bex.

Review: Joque harness

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