Jan 282017
 

Vibratex Mystic Wand Rechargeable vibrator

It’s a let-down, but not in the “my clit is screaming” way. Not in the “orgasm seems like an impassable river” way, or even in the “these vibrations feel like death” way. But in the manageably sad way, like your car stereo breaking right before a big road trip. Not apocalyptic, but less than ideal. I expected to love this vibrator, but you know what happens when your hopes are high: they get dashed.

The Vibratex Mystic Wand Rechargeable weakens under the weight of comparison. It cannot outshine its competitors or its predecessor. Its shape bears similarities to other sex toys that surpass it; its name sets up promises it cannot keep. It is a “wand” only very loosely, and is in many ways a downgrade from the vibrator that came before it.

Vibratex’s original Mystic Wand, which I reviewed 5 years ago, is an old-school gem. Even all these years later, it remains a lazy masturbation favorite — one of the only vibes to survive my (inadvertent) exodus from battery-operated toys. Known for its uniquely intense vibrations, the Mystic Wand is great through undies, when I want something to cover my general genital vicinity, when the precision of the Mona 2 or Prism V would be unwelcome. It’s perfect for hotels, sick days, when you’re holed up in bed with nothing to do but read scandalous fan fiction. It’s particularly handy when you want to get off but at any moment a dude might walk in your house to ask your opinion on the lattice design for the fence he’s building you.

To some extent, for me, all of this is still true in the Mystic Wand Rechargeable. But the power that buoyed the original is not present in this one, and it’s a problem. I had foolishly hoped they’d add power, not take it away. That seems reasonable, yes? Evolution, not regression? Instead, they kept the same 3 steady settings and 3 patterns, and… reduced the intensity. For everything.

I knew something was awry when I blew right past the first setting on the Rechargeable — which is not something I do with the original. In fact, I’ve had many a first-rate orgasm on that setting.

I can lay it out in no plainer terms:

  • Mystic Wand Rechargeable 1
  • Mystic Wand 1 / Mystic Wand Rechargeable 2
  • Mystic Wand Rechargeable 3
  • Mystic Wand 2
  • Mystic Wand 3

The most revealing fact here: the original Mystic Wand is noticeably stronger on level 2 than the Mystic Wand Rechargeable is on high. LE SIGH.

Can a toy like this even call itself a wand, a type of vibrator characterized by its impressive power? It seems risky. Sure, the Mystic Wand Rechargeable’s vibrations have a rumbly, robust quality that causes deeper stimulation and surprisingly effortless orgasms — it’s better, at least, than the Tantus Rumble’s buzzy motor and awkward, pancake-shaped head. But it’s not wand-like in its vibration strength.

A let-down, not a travesty.

I can get off with the Mystic Wand Rechargeable no problem, and I enjoy it, but I trust you to apply that information appropriately to yourself. For more sensitive people — and I count myself in that group, both when it comes to clitoral reaction and how quickly I cry when an authority figure speaks sternly to me — this amount of power is adequate. But if you need traditional Hitachi– and Doxy-level vibrations, this is not a suitable choice. And if you just want a good rechargeable toy, the We-Vibe Rave and LELO Mona 2 are both more powerful than the Mystic Wand Rechargeable.

Vibratex Mystic Wand Rechargeable vibrator

It’s not all gloom, though. The Rechargeable is heaps better than its first iteration, which won #1 worst sex toy of 2012 due to its unforgivable battery life of SIX minutes. The battery seems fine on this new version, and it can be used while plugged in, so the possibility of a dead toy ruining your masturbation session is almost nil. It’s USB rechargeable, with one of those pinpoint stabby things, and comes with a USB-to-wall adapter.

There are several other admirable features of the Mystic Wand Rechargeable. It’s quite lightweight and doesn’t vibrate my hand. It has a single power button, then three identical function buttons in different locations to accommodate the various ways people might hold the toy. I’ve never seen this done before, and it’s GENIUS.1 I realize this is very much a sex toy nerd thing, but whatever. If you can’t innovate with power, innovate with button placement, I guess??

I’m indifferent about the curved handle. I always find this shape slightly bothersome and would prefer a straight handle, but I’m not going to throw a Twitter tantrum over it or anything.

Same deal with the useless ridges circling the head — I don’t need to get traction on my clit, so these just look like crevasses waiting to be filled with vag gunk. (My neurotic brain interjects, technically wouldn’t it be vulv gunk?) More worryingly, though, some bloggers have reported pretty serious issues with the construction of the Rechargeable.

Meanwhile, the original Mystic Wand is the elephant in the room. It has nothing left to prove — it proved itself worthy long ago. It hovers right behind the Mystic Wand Rechargeable, costing 20 bucks less for better vibrations. Without this guidepost of excellence, this bar, the Rechargeable would seem good. But its predecessor negates its usefulness.

You could say I’m bitching too heavily about the power issue, and you might be right. In the grand scheme of things, zooming out, this is nowhere near a terrible motor. That’s why I exist, though — to tell you it’s not the worst, but it’s also not the best. Objectively, even: the power isn’t enough, the vibration range isn’t there, and other toys do the same shit better.

In terms of smaller-profile rechargeable wands, the Iconic Wand ($75), PalmPower Recharge ($70), and Shibari Mini Halo Wand ($47) have earned high marks from bloggers I trust. When it comes to larger wands, the mighty Magic Wand Rechargeable ($125) is the king of my castle. But for those seeking an inexpensive but effective wand-style vibrator, I’ve always recommended the hardworking Mystic Wand ($50)… and I still will.

The Mystic Wand Rechargeable should have been the best of both worlds. A perfect blend of new technology and the historically satisfying intensity of its predecessor. It’s halfway there; it has the intuitive controls, rumbly vibrations, rechargeability, sleek all-black look. And that’s great and all, but without enough oomph, what kind of vibrator are you? Not one in the running.

Get the Mystic Wand or Mystic Wand Rechargeable at SheVibe.

Shop all my favorite sex toys at SheVibe!

  1. Given the choice, it seems, I prefer the button on the back in the middle. Huh! []
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