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  • Reviews
    Reviews

    The bread and butter of this blog: sex toy reviews! Want to browse my reviews in a different way? Check out my Toybox, consult my list of tags, or jump to the worst stuff I’ve tried or my favorites.

    A basket of fruit and vegetables (carrot, cucumber, yam, corn, bunch of bananas) in the grass, on top of a tea towel with the word "MASTURBATION" on it.

    Produce fucking: which fruit or veggie makes the best dildo?

    Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

    Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal. Cassette player lying in the grass, surrounded by sex toys and Epiphora-labeled cassette tapes.

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Review: We-Vibe Touch X + Tango X

  • Guides
    Guides

    Let me teach you things! Such as how to become a savvy sex toy shopper and avoid sex toys that will poison you.

    Me holding the Lovehoney Flash and Doxy Don, demonstrating the way one moves much more visibly than the other (and thus is much rumblier).

    Buzzy vs. rumbly: the most important aspect of a vibrator

    A selection of toxic sex toys. They smell like beach balls.

    Your genitals deserve better: the case against toxic sex toys

    Epiphora’s best and worst sex toys of 2018

    September 2014: Ejaculate all over my leg and soaked through a towel from the njoy Pure Wand.

    How I know squirting is real (and also not pee)

    Colorful vibrators and kegel balls surrounded by iridescent curly ribbons.

    Epiphora’s sex toy gift-giving guide

  • Banter
    Banter

    Ramblings, usually about sex toys, sometimes about my gaping vagina, sometimes about sex-related falsehoods perpetuated by the media. Notable subcategories include Disingenuous Assholes and True Life: I’m A Sex Toy Reviewer.

    Me wearing my harness with the Vixen Creations Leo dildo inside, an orange dildo with a bat pattern.

    Queer sex party chronicles: pumpkin spice orgy

    Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool's retrospective

    Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool’s retrospective

    A circle of people wearing harnesses and dildos, arranged in a circle and shot from above. Dildos pointing into the middle.

    Queer sex party chronicles: a magical birthday

    A basket of fruit and vegetables (carrot, cucumber, yam, corn, bunch of bananas) in the grass, on top of a tea towel with the word "MASTURBATION" on it.

    Produce fucking: which fruit or veggie makes the best dildo?

    Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

    Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

  • New here?
    • Get directions!
    • Greatest hits
    • Tags & categories
  • Toybox
  • All-time faves
  • Buy toys
    Buy toys
    Dildos on display, courtesy of Early to Bed, one of my favorite indie sex shops.

    Epiphora-approved sex toy shops

    Various sex toys laid out on a grey table next to a rainbow blanket, with hang tags displaying handwritten prices.

    Sex toy sales, deals, and promos

    Finn Carson and Calvin Banks kissing, on CockyBoys

    Epiphora-approved porn

  • FAQ
  • Random

vibrators

All posts tagged “vibrators.” Usually, reviews of vibrators. So there’s a lot here, because my life has been dedicated to vibrators.

Latest
  • Latest
  • Oldest
  • Random
  • A to Z
Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Drugstore condom company vibrator showdown

July 25, 2012
They’ve figured us out, guys. THEY KNOW. People… actually… use… vibrators. The newest model on the shelves is the Tri-Phoria,...
Keep Reading
Jimmyjane Little Chroma on top of my blender.
Greatest HitsSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Little Chroma

July 9, 2012
The Jimmyjane Little Chroma is a scam. Not like your “friend” emailing you in distress because they’re stranded in London....
Keep Reading
Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Duet

June 11, 2012
I can now say that I own a vibrator engraved with my name. Or, I should say, engraved with the...
Keep Reading
Wahl, Hitachi, Rock Box
Greatest HitsSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Rock Box

May 21, 2012
Lovehoney sure likes to keep secrets from me. First it was the Sqweel, and now the ominously-named Rock Box, which I...
Keep Reading
BMS Factory Leaf Life rechargeable vibrator
Hi, I love youSex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Life

May 10, 2012
The Leaf Life looks like something you’d pick up along a nature trail. Colored a cheery green and shaped like a fat...
Keep Reading
BanterTrue Life: I'm A Sex Toy Reviewer

Soaked-through paper towels

April 24, 2012
Sometimes I wait an embarrassingly long time to clean my sex toys. But that’s the beauty of non-porous toys — they clean...
Keep Reading
Greatest HitsKegel ExercisersSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Intensity

April 11, 2012
The Intensity, as the fable goes, did not begin as a sex toy. It began as a medical apparatus used...
Keep Reading
LELO PicoBong Kiki vibrator (photo by Mandi at EROntric, used with permission)
Greatest HitsSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Kiki

February 20, 2012
I was going to ignore PicoBong altogether. Although I was initially drawn to the brand because, well, LELO invented it...
Keep Reading
Best & Worst Sex Toys of the YearGuides

Epiphora’s best and worst sex toys of 2011

December 31, 2011
It’s almost 2012, so you (maybe) know what that means — it’s time for me to list my top and...
Keep Reading
LELO Lyla remote controlled vibrator, lying in the grass in Maui.
Sex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Lyla

December 28, 2011
Soaring hope followed by crushing despair. That’s the LELO Lyla. The first ever rechargeable wireless egg, meant for insertion in...
Keep Reading
iVibe Massager phone app
Greatest HitsSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: iVibe Massager phone app

December 21, 2011
When asking me to review the iVibe Massager iPhone app, the developer freely admitted to me — and I quote —...
Keep Reading
Sex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Y-Bullet

December 14, 2011
The Lady Calston Y-Bullet is a HIGH-TECH device. It plugs into your USB PORT. It runs off PURE USB ADRENALINE. Its...
Keep Reading
Welp, this is about as interesting as I could make it look. Jimmyjane Form 4 lying on some metal thing on my balcony.
Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Form 4

November 28, 2011
I know what you’re thinking. After such distressing trysts with Jimmyjane’s Form 6, Form 2, and Form 3, why the...
Keep Reading
BMS Factory Leaf vibrator line, looking very greeeeen.
FeaturesHell Yes / Um, No

Hell Yes: Leaf

November 14, 2011
BMS Factory has not made much of anything that’s too terribly noteworthy. They make locking toy cases, an extensive line of...
Keep Reading
We-Vibe Touch hanging out in a tiny adorable casserole dish.
Hi, I love youSex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Touch

November 7, 2011
Here’s a sentence only a sex toy freak would ever write: I’ve been waiting a long time for a company...
Keep Reading
Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Mimi

September 11, 2011
Everyone’s coming out with a cute little rechargeable clitoral stimulator these days. Jimmyjane released the Form 2 and Form 3;...
Keep Reading
1 … 3 4 5 6 7 … 11

Latest posts

Epiphora's best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday!

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday! (2024)

Me wearing my harness with the Vixen Creations Leo dildo inside, an orange dildo with a bat pattern.

Queer sex party chronicles: pumpkin spice orgy

Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool's retrospective

Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool’s retrospective

Epiphora's Black Friday sex toy sales and deals!

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday! (2023)

A circle of people wearing harnesses and dildos, arranged in a circle and shot from above. Dildos pointing into the middle.

Queer sex party chronicles: a magical birthday

Recent comments

Greatest Hits

A decade of sex blogging. Cupcake butt plug and Shilo.

A decade of sex blogging

Holding the key to dildo mansion.

15 things I learned buying a house as a sex blogger

njoy Pure Wand stainless steel G-spot dildo on a painting of the ocean waves.

My love, the Pure Wand (+ a few tips!)

A selection of toxic sex toys. They smell like beach balls.

Your genitals deserve better: the case against toxic sex toys

The Sybian... and packing materials.

Today in my life… a stranger on the internet gifted me a Sybian

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