Nov 122015
 

Fun Factory Bouncer kegel ball dildoOh, Fun Factory. You poor things. Do you not realize what the word “bouncer” insinuates here in America? That’s the guy who slices up fake IDs in vodka commercials. The guy who tells you your slacks are not appropriate for the sex club. The guy whose existence you begrudgingly accept because he might protect you from peril at some point, but who is mostly just macho and huge and ridiculous.

It’s true that the Bouncer needs a technical name, though, since simply meandering across its shape would not grab your attention. You’d never know without reading a description or holding this dildo in your hands that each ripple contains a free-moving ball, ready to roll around when the toy is jostled.

Yeah — kegel ball style.

This may have never been done before, at least in a dildo? It’s pretty cool. You should’ve seen my boyfriend’s face when I handed it to him and asked him to shake it. He looked so magnificently bewildered. Anything that garners that reaction needs to go in my vagina, stat.

But life with the Fun Factory Bouncer is not as simple as insertion. It’s not a set-it-and-forget-it dildo. At least not if I want to feel the unique sensation promised by that initial intriguing shake.

The first order of business is talking my vagina into chilling out. Its instinct with insertables is to clench, to grasp, but clenching impedes movement, and movement is what the Bouncer needs. So it feels a bit like a battle: my PC muscle against the Bouncer. Or my PC muscle against my brain? It requires re-wiring and conscious relaxation.

The second issue is, well… I didn’t realize how truly lazy I am with my dildos until I got the Bouncer. I don’t constantly or consistently thrust with most of them; it’s more like a gentle nudge here and there. I only speed up and get into what could be described as a “rhythm” when I’m near orgasm.

With the Bouncer, to feel the inner balls, I have to jiggle the shit out of the toy the entire time. Even a generic thrusting — which would already be more movement than usual for me — won’t do it. I have to grab the base and shake the toy in a tight, swift, back-and-forth motion, like I’m setting the glitter adrift in a snow globe.

When I get it going, the rolling sensation of the balls really does feel unique and rad. It’s similar to what the LELO Luna Beads feel like, but more pronounced and more pleasurable in the context of masturbation.

It’s as if my vaginal canal is a putt-putt golf hole getting neverending holes-in-one.

As if my vag is the dome in that kids’ push toy that I just learned is grotesquely called a corn popper.

It’s as if I’m really bad at similes.

Against my G-spot, if I can keep up the jiggling, I fucking love it. I want it to continue always and forever. I want to bask in it, savor it. Especially when I’m about to come.

But it’s a lot of work. The sustained shaking. The persistence. My hand gets tired, and I feel pressured to reach orgasm faster, to ensure that I’m able to jiggle adequately leading up to — and through — the peak. Yet I want to jiggle the entire time, because failing to do so means a mediocre overall masturbation experience.

That’s because the Bouncer’s form is otherwise unimpressive. Those wimpy little waves do nothing for me, other than awkwardly sitting right at my vaginal opening. It doesn’t have texture for my vag to delight in. It’s too rigid. It’s not a great G-spotter, so just squeezing it with my PC muscle while it’s stationary doesn’t do much.

The rolly balls are the Bouncer’s saving grace, but I cry knowing there’s no way to automate their movement. I tried holding my Hitachi against the base of the Bouncer, but the rolly balls remained stubbornly still while the rest of the toy vibrated. Typical penetrative sex acts don’t make the balls rattle either, so the Bouncer would not excel in a harness — unless, say, you were strapped into a vibrating belt weight loss machine.

Until someone invents a robot to hold the toy and do the correct motion for me, I’m stuck with the fallible object that is my left hand.

I’m a whiny bastard, I know.

I want to take a moment to give Fun Factory props, though. This is a toy that needed to exist, and they created it without resorting to sweeping, grand statements about its orgasmic abilities, without prescribing who should use it and how, without dramatically patting themselves on the back for their genius. This, still, is rare in the adult industry.

If the Bouncer gave me its delicious rolly ball stimulation with no effort on my part (like my beloved Stronic Eins does), I’d be gleefully hawking it to anyone in search of a new sensation. It really does feel neat. But it requires serious hand stamina, its shape is dull, and its three-digit price of $100 makes it less of an interesting thing to try and more of a splurge.

I have no doubt there are people in this world for whom using this toy will not be a strenuous endeavor. I applaud you, my valiant comrades and fellow dong worshippers. But remember, the sensation is very much tied to the amount of effort exerted. There’s no getting around it.

So start pumping that iron in preparation now — this is a dildo for people willing to put in the grunt work.

Fun Factory Bouncer

Get the Bouncer at SheVibe, Early to Bed, Babeland, Good Vibes, Pleasure ChestShe Bop,
directly through Fun Factory USA, or at Come As You Are (Canada).

  • Ones

    Rumbler seems like it would have been a better name.

  • Mary Q. Contrary

    Oh god I *need* to try this now! I have one and I haven’t used it yet, but I have the Orgasmatronics X2 and the dildo attacher attachment (yes, a way to automate the jiggle, but not inexpensively). I will get on this ASAP and report back.

  • lizxnn disaster

    Great review! yes, def. not for the lazy masturbation session- I have found that a silicone cock ring with a bit of a lower frequency (I used the Ooh by JeJou cock ring) on the base of the dil does make the balls pop a little, and it means I don’t have to hold a second vibe.

  • FieryRed

    Love the review, as always! I’m wondering if one could insert Bouncer, then sit in a vibrating chair or even just bounce one’s whole body up and down… Maybe even use it as a kegel exerciser, holding it in while working out… Hee.

  • And here I thought my arms were weak. I guess they just need the right incentive and not making me the worst wuss in the gym isn’t cutting it.

  • I really doubt a chair or straddling would help with the sensation. The toy itself has to be shaken for the inner balls to roll adequately.

  • Zee

    Does it have a suction cup base? Because you could mount it on the wall and thrust against it…

  • Lia Heavvymetalqueen

    I love Fun Factory so much even though sometimes their toys might not be perfect. They keep improving themselves and stay as affordable as they possibly can. They’re definitely a good source of dildos for us Europeans who can’t afford the 100$ shipping for a Tantus (and they make short dildos! For people with shallow vags!)

    I am quite intrigued by this one but the workout seems something I might not be able to do until I’m considerably more swole!

  • Talia

    Thanks for the review – I was intrigued by the Bouncer, but I’m probably too lazy to use it. I suppose the trick would be to get a partner to use it on me…

  • Ivan Konev

    > it requires serious hand stamina
    > Until someone invents a robot to hold the toy and do the correct motion
    Such robot is already invented, it’s called “a man”.

    But seriously, have you tried it with a male partner? I have a feeling that it’s a couple’s toys for active, athletic sex, and it would probably excel as a manual sex toy.

    > its shape is dull
    Have you tried Magnum? 🙂

  • Fuzzy

    Just need to make this in a sybian attachment version, apparently.

  • Erika

    I’m quite intrigued by this toy and I loooove that it comes in that bright watermelon color. Yum! I am not much for thrusting when I masturbate with any dildo, so likely I’d use this during partnered sex. Also!! I can’t be the only one with arms that somehow seem too short for proper toy thrusting? Tell me I’m not alone!

    My partner and I are working through some mutual (not acquired from each other) sexual hangups and this could be a great toy when I want more exciting penetration options that my partner is not able to physically provide at that moment (but is still interested in doing stuff to me).

  • Uh, first of all, could you not prescribe how I should use something? This is my blog and it’s my choice. Two, a partner will become just as fatigued as I will using this toy. Oh but right, HE won’t, because HE will be a BIG POWERFUL MAN.

  • Jane

    The authorities would disapprove if I shoved a man into my locked toy box and only brought him out once a week.

  • Spangle

    Why does the gender of the partner make a difference?

  • Lia Heavvymetalqueen

    “it’s called a man” – oh honey, sure it is.

  • Kate from Fun Factory

    I’m going to say yes, and I’m also going to qualify that yes. It won’t have the same hold as something with a more suction-cup-shaped base, but it can stick to smooth surfaces like glass and some shower walls.

  • catherine wall

    I really want to try fun factory now!

  • When someone who can easily wield Pure Wands with ease says using a thing is tiring, that fucken MEANS something.

  • This seems like such a chore and I hate that many toys I’ve bought tend to fall into that category of “it’s good if I want to work for an orgasm”. I don’t use toys to make work. Looks fun though so maybe I won’t rule it out.

  • ShriektheMighty

    I was reading this thinking, ‘it sounds like a stronic without the motor’ and then you made the comparison yourself! I am actually really interested in this, because I do get thrust crazy with my dildos, so it might be right up my alley.

  • OpheliaV

    It sees like a prime candidate to be made into a pulsator toy like the stronic line. I don’t know what the guts of the Stronic toys look like, and only a passing knowledge of the hardware needed to make something shake like that. But if the toy itself was mounted on a pulsator motor, would that make it better?

  • Come Heather

    Can you tell me more about mans please? Can you direct me to your blog about mans?

  • AceDenise

    Seriously, why does it have to be a “male” partner? Using a dildo should not be limited to “partner” sex, you should be able to use it however you want, with (or without) whoever you want. And some of us would prefer a sex robot to an actual person. I admit nothing.

  • Mary Q. Contrary

    You’re not alone!

  • AceDenise

    I wonder if it would help to hold a strong vibrator against the base or something? Like the Tango or even a wand? But that still sounds like too much work for me.

  • Lilith

    From the review: “I tried holding my Hitachi against the base of the Bouncer, but the rolly balls remained stubbornly still while the rest of the toy vibrated.”

  • Lilith

    OMG genius idea! THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW IF THAT WILL WORK.

  • AceDenise

    Oops sorry, missed that part! Brain’s a little slow today…

  • AceDenise

    I wonder if that would even be possible,since the stronics have a weight that moves forward and back along a rod inside the toy (from what I have read about them)- seems like the rolly balls would block that movement?

  • AceDenise

    Definitely not alone!

  • AceDenise

    Are you referring to the “man” in your avatar? It’s He-Man, BTW. Yes, I am old enough to know who that is, although I much prefer Voltron.and Jem 🙂 I hope you didn’t mean to sound condescending, but you could have used the word “person” instead of “man”.

  • AceDenise

    Yes, in the name of science!

  • fire

    A pity I am so lazy :/

  • Mary Q. Contrary

    #lesspantsmorescience

  • Mary Q. Contrary

    Sorry! Haven’t had a chance to do this. About mid-strength achieves maximum jiggle.

  • OpheliaV

    Putting the balls in with the pulsator weight would be impossible in that case. Trying to do both would make an unusable mess. Maybe if there were another way for the balls to shake themselves?

  • Ivan Konev

    Calm down, ladies. I’m not a male chauvinist, I just look like one. Actually, I’m a nice guy who likes cats.

  • GW

    just like only a man can wield thors hammer, only a man can wield the bouncer… oh wait, neither of those things are true.

  • I don’t think it would, honestly. The Stronic movement is so plodding, I doubt it would make the balls roll enough.

  • Please do not call me or my readers “ladies.”

  • “Actually, I’m a nice guy”

  • It does attach to smooth surfaces fairly well, yes, but there is no way that a human could move enough against the toy itself to make the balls roll. Unless there’s an earthquake happening…

  • Dannicula

    I wonder if someone has dissected the Bouncer. From holding it, it seemed like the balls themselves were tightly in there and only the weights within moved. I wonder if there would be some way to allow free movement of the balls themselves to allow more jiggle… but that may not be possible and I could be totally wrong about the mechanics as is.

  • AceDenise

    All you had to do was say, “Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean it that way.” And maybe offer a “thanks for the great review”, instead of telling people who have a valid point to “calm down” and then also telling us how “nice” you are. If you were a nice guy, you wouldn’t need to tell people that. And you would have simply just apologized. And obviously, you are not a regular reader of this blog or its comments if you think the “ladies” need to calm down. This IS calm, for us. And polite, so far. And not everyone here is a “lady”. Please, just stop before you dig yourself any deeper.

  • FieryRed

    Right, but I was thinking that if the user is moving her/his whole body enough – not thrusting, just bouncing up and down with the toy inserted – it might make the balls roll around. But then, of course, one might as well get a good set of rolly-ball kegel balls…

  • Tzipora

    So I’m guessing not because I shook one of these in a store the other day but… Say you’ve got this in a toy mount (ala the Liberator bonbon or wing… I have a wing on the way lol) or straddling a partner in a harness… Would grinding while atop one wiggle the balls any? (Wow that sounds like I’m talking about a penis haha). Just a thought. Suppose it depends on how rapidly you’re grinding.

    When I first saw this on the Fun Factory site awhile ago I excitedly sent the link to a queer friend and we discussed the strapon potential. I believe you now though that it won’t work well in most senses there. Heck I don’t know if I was wearing them wrong and have been too lazy to try again but I had trouble getting my Luna beads to move much (my cat can attest to how much I jumped and jiggled around trying though. Lol.)

    But I still wonder about the grinding atop them idea. Suppose you’ve gotta be into that kind of stimulation too. I am. Tribbing is like my favorite partnered activity. So what do you think? Test it for me? Please? Suppose Luna beads and grinding said toy mount or a partner would basically achieve the same though so meh…

  • Tzipora

    I so didn’t read the comments before my own comment but had a similar question but I don’t know that you’d have to bounce, just vigorously grind against something (like a partner who is wearing it in a harness or a toy mount like the Liberator ones). Would serve more of a sexual purpose than bouncing up and down at least. Lol. But my conclusion was then the same, Luna beads would achieve exactly the same.

  • FieryRed

    Note to self: If I ever move back to SoCal, must buy a Bouncer for earthquake enjoyment.

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