Most important news first, y’all: Fun Factory’s Stronic G is a REVELATION. Like the other Stronics, this toy thrusts all by itself — but this one can be used hands-free, and its perfectly-hooked tip gives my G-spot everything it craves. Ooof. So good. Lube dispensers are all the rage now and I blame me. The Touch heats your lube and will utilize any lube you want, unlike the exorbitantly expensive Pulse, which takes proprietary pods. Sliquid has a toy cleaner! I still don’t really believe in toy cleaners, but at least I trust Sliquid not to put junk ingredients in theirs. Screaming O just released a few new toys in their “Affordable Rechargeable” line. I’m very curious if the motors . . . read more

We-Vibe is making cock rings! And a butt plug! All of ’em are app-compatible, which makes a lot of sense for toys that get all up in your genitals’ business. Rumbly vibrations, too, I bet. Gooood. How truly majestic is this new uncut dildo from New York Toy Collective? And I thought Carter was beefy — this toy is 2.5″ in diameter! In keeping with their “let’s name sex toys after people” theme, it is called… Leroy. Yeah. Well. I’m having some conflicted feelings about the Womanizer 2GO. I’m not a lipstick person at all, but the idea of a smaller, less potato-shaped Womanizer does appeal to me. Tantus’ latest offerings include ball stretchers and a selection of classic dildos recast in . . . read more

Feeldoe More, Realdoe Stout, ShareVibe, Tango. I’ve never thought strapless strap-on dildos were the second coming of Christ. Let’s start there. I have my Joque harness, I have well-loved strap-on dildos, and I am comfortable combining those things and fucking someone silly. I’ve never felt like strap-on sex wasn’t “intimate” enough, or like I needed extra genital stimulation in order to enjoy it. For me, the pleasure comes from wielding a cock, achieving ideal positioning and thrusting, and watching myself plunge into the depths of an orifice. (I love labia, all labia, labia forever — so I will take literally any chance to ogle them.) Strapless strap-on dildos attempt to eliminate the harness aspect altogether. These double-ended toys have a bulb . . . read more

[This post is an April Fool’s Day joke. However, because I am very dedicated to my jokes, I actually did do all these things.] Perhaps “tiny” is condescending. “Diminutive”? “Miniature”? “Wee”? I don’t want to be flippant or rude, but it’s an objective fact that these dildos are roughly 1/60th the size of their, shall I say, phallotypical counterparts. This is not going to be girth mania. Lowing your expectations for pleasure might be a good idea. Rewiring your brain, wiping all data about previously-experienced insertables: encouraged. Over the years I’ve amassed quite the collection of tiny silicone dildos from Tantus, Bad Dragon, Fun Factory, and Vamp. They accumulate in my purse, come home in my suitcase from conferences, and materialize in crevasses of my life. One time I found one, inexplicably, in . . . read more

Vixen has released a peculiar dildo called the VixenAire Mustang. It inflates when you apply pressure to the base. I love my Mustang, but the VixenAire only inflates near the base of the toy, which I find weird??? For ages, I’ve hoped a company aside from Bad Dragon would invent a silicone squirting dildo. It has become so with the Pop! A SQWEEL FOR YOUR DICK. It looks like a torture device, but so do all the Sqweels. Fun Factory’s latest vibes are Lady Bi, a rabbit, and Moody, a curved G-spot/prostate toy with a textured flared base. It comes in orange! Um, yes, my need to rub these vibrators all over my body is strong. These are the new Tenga . . . read more

[Check out my annual best/worst tag for older and newer lists!] What a year 2015 was! I showed my face on the internet and subsequently used it to prank all of you. I got emotional about what being a writer means to me, then had my work published in Best Sex Writing of the Year. I managed to get out of the house a couple times, to attend the Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit, an epic sex blogger retreat, and two smaller #dildoholiday vacations with friends. When the universe manifested yet another “scientific” “study” “proving” that squirt is pee, I protested loudly, and so did many of you. Dr. Drew was perplexed. 2015 was the year I programmed my own vibration patterns, took a video of the inside of my . . . read more

Fun Factory has a whole host of new stuff! There’s Miss Bi, a dual vibe with two strong-ass motors; Calice, an oddly-shaped mini vibe (my girlfriend: “it’s like someone said, make it look like a penis AND a vulva“), and Bi Stronic Fusion [update: I reviewed it here!] a Stronic/vibe hybrid. Spareparts Hardwear, makers of the most durable underwear-style harness on the market as well as my fave harness, now have a boxer briefs harness! And New York Toy Collective has an uncircumcised dildo: Ellis! Tantus recently released the Duchess, a dual-density version of their Duke, as well as the Starter and Gary. Yes, Gary. A dildo named Gary. LELO just remembered that prostates exist and have unveiled the Loki (aka Butt Mona), Bruno/Hugo, and Loki Wave. . . . read more

REJOICE, because Fun Factory is retiring their G4 line of vibrators in favor of G5. The G5s, which come in classic designs like Tiger, Big Boss, and Patchy Paul, have satisfying clicky buttons. Writing this, I am now realizing how much of a nerd I am that I’m excited about different buttons. They also have more settings, OK? The latest in sex toy crowdfunding campaigns includes a smart cock ring called Lovely and a 6-motor bendable vibe named Crescendo. Astroglide released a sperm-friendly lube called Astroglide TTC. Nice try, guys, but Yes already does it with much better ingredients. Tantus’ new Vibrating Progressive Beads are a great contribution to society. Silicone anal beads are already important, but vibrating ones even more so. Now the question is, can I put my Tango in . . . read more

Crave is crowdfunding for their next two vibrators, the Flex and Duet Flex. Backers will have access to an online application for creating their own vibration patterns, which they can then download onto their devices. We-Vibe released a new collection, featuring a pearl white Tango and an Epiphora-blue We-Vibe 4. Proof that life is not fair. I can’t handle this set of limited edition toys from Fun Factory, called Funtastics. I am easily swayed by the phrase “limited edition” but I know that Fun Factory’s bullet is so damn buzzy and I would regret it. BUT LOOK AT THEM. GOD. The powerful-as-fuck Doxy Wand will soon come in a DIE CAST version! [Edit: I reviewed it!] Tantus’ excellent Super Soft C Ring now . . . read more