If you ask me, sex toys are way better gifts than socks or body wash. Now I may be biased, considering I own over 400 of them and have been testing them and reviewing them for six years, but you know. The point is, I have OPINIONS about things that go on vulvas and in vaginas and butts, and even sometimes over penises. Today, I was on Sex Out Loud Radio telling the universe all about my top sex toy gift ideas — plus my tips for picking out a sex toy for someone else. As an accompaniment, here’s the written version — along with photos of the toys and links to my reviews. Where should you shop? My favorite stores are . . . read more

It’s been three years since I reviewed the NobEssence Seduction (oh my god, I’m OLD), and in that time, my extreme fervor for this dildo may have gotten lost somewhere, confined to emails and little Twitter freakouts and cruel Tumblr ultimatums. But case in point: I once had a dream I got angry, accidentally broke my Seduction, and just started bawling. Luckily, I’ve found the perfect way to revive my love for the Seduction in Nuala MacMoragh, a reader who bought it based on my recommendation and was just as impressed. I asked her to take a photo of her Seduction, which is made of Padauk wood, and share her experience with y’all. After a little email banter about our mutual love . . . read more

Dude, Tantus has gone nuts with the new things this month! Not only did they re-design their website (eradicating most of the pink, YES!), but they released two new sets of toys: tri-colored space toys and new plugs with excellent bases! I dunno about you, but I gotta have that Twist Plug. GASP, new toys from NobEssence! These are the Dare and Mesmerize. Not to point fingers, but does someone at NobEssence have baby fever or something? Fun Factory is coming out with a line of “thrusting” toys. I discuss their potential to be either really awesome or an utter failure on el blog. Just 2 weeks left to preorder yet another vibe controlled by a smartphone! And its name, Vibease, . . . read more

[Check out my annual best/worst tag for older and newer lists!] It’s almost 2012, so you (maybe) know what that means — it’s time for me to list my top and bottom toys of 2011! Remember, like last year, this list includes toys that I acquired/reviewed in 2011, not necessarily toys that were released this year. Anyway, let’s get to it! Best sex toys of 2011 Vixen Creations Mustang — For the second year in a row, a toy made of VixSkin tops the list. Is it any wonder? VixSkin is so good, anything made out of it is amazing. Even smallish dildos like the Mustang. My vag was definitely surprised. We-Vibe Touch — Finally, a rechargeable clit vibe in a perfectly pointed, scooped . . . read more

My first wooden dildo was the NobEssence Linger, a meager yet bulbous1 little thing with a finger hole. The NobEssence Allure is like a second edition of the Linger, expanded and deluxe. The finger hole has been replaced with a G-spotting bulb, and the bloops on the shaft have been enlarged, elongated, and straightened out. The G-spotting bulb: good call. I never use finger holes anyway. Best replace them with something mind-blowing! My Allure is made of Black Palm, which I’ll sadly concede is not as beautiful as I thought it would be. I had unrealistic expectations, as I’d seen a photo of a Black Palm dildo… with flash. As we all know, flash changes everything, and it made the dark brown . . . read more

Click to embiggen. Yes, my friends! The time has come! No longer will you have to slave away on the internets trying to figure out WTF that-one-toy-in-Epiphora’s-header is. No longer will you have to sheepishly email/tweet me and awkwardly try to describe the location of the toy you need identified. I took the picture that became my header image in fall of 2008, when I bought HeyEpiphora.com, so these toys are all from that time. Some of them are a bit embarrassing… Evolved Symphony Rhapsody Hitachi Magic Wand — I received my first one a little too early in my reviewing career. Yeesh. Phallix Cobalt Twister Vixen Creations Buddy — My first butt plug! It wouldn’t stay in! Liberator Fascinator Throe . . . read more

I am unabashed about my love for the NobEssence Romp. I can’t help it if it’s the best butt plug ever made, okay?! I can’t help it if I turn into a ROOOOOMP zombie every time I talk about it! But in case you don’t believe just me, or are wary to drop the cash — you’re in luck. My amigo, Andy (who recently launched a blog, so go smother him!), has also experienced the ROOOOOMP, and he was just as blown away as I was. Here is what he has to say about it: FINALLY, I bit the bullet and bought a Romp… I’d been after one of these since reading Piph’s glowing review. I’d never heard of a . . . read more

These kinds of emails are the best to receive: It’s time for another round of awkward question of the day: Would you be able to take a picture of your Seduction and Intrigue? I really want both of those, but I’m having a hard time discerning between the colors of the wood from your blog picture. Why yes, of course! But I must throw Romp in there for good measure: Seduction (Purpleheart), Romp (Cocobolo), and Intrigue (Cocobolo). Hello, wood. You are looking quite beautiful today!

I had such fun with all of you throughout my Woodgasm giveaway! Especially at the bangin’ Twitter parties! Now that the festivities have wound down, I have randomly chosen a winner. That lucky winner is… Amber, who chose the NobEssence Tryst as her prize. I approve of this! Many thanks to SheVibe, who furnished this giveaway. If you ever want a sweet deal on any sex toy, seriously, go buy it at SheVibe. So, question: what did you guys think of the Twitter parties? We should do it again sometime, don’t you think? Any ideas for improvements? Perhaps give away sex toys during the parties?