A celebration of karmic demise.

Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.
Lora DiCarlo, the “sex tech” start-up that vowed to revolutionize the pleasure industry and pompously acted like the first to ever do so, has shut down after only 3 years. Their site is offline, orders have gone unfulfilled for months, and there are rumors of bankruptcy. For a company named after a woman, Lora DiCarlo sure had the attitude of a man:... Keep Reading
Need more sex toys for your black holes? Behold, my epic guide to the best sex toy deals! If you’ve been waiting to buy the vibrator, dildo, or butt plug of your dreams, now’s your chance. These are the best prices and sweeping discounts you’ll find all year. Fill your cart and also your orifices. I won’t make a big bang joke,... Keep Reading
Having jacked off to pornographic material for two decades now, I think I’ve earned the title “porn connoisseur.” I’ve been watching the stuff since I was [redacted], and I spend practically every masturbation session ogling naked bodies on a screen. I’m addicted, you might say, if you were a factually incorrect zealot. We all know I have a discerning vagina, but I’m... Keep Reading

Greatest hits

I’m sure my writing teachers are very proud.

njoy Pure Plugs (medium and large) in a jewelry box with a bunch of gaudy bracelets and rings.
I could’ve written a review for the njoy Pure Plugs before ever putting a single one in my ass. Of course, I would never do... Keep Reading
Fun Toys G-Vibe, a purple dildo with a split shape, creepin' on the neighbors through the blinds.
There are some failtastic sex toys that I keep around simply so I can lug them out in the future and confirm my previous findings.... Keep Reading
Black LELO Ora (original), blue LELO Ora 2 on a hardwood floor.
I wish the entirety of this review could just be the word no. Not even repeated for emphasis, not even in all caps. Just a single,... Keep Reading

Daily dose of snark

When you just need some righteous rage. So, every day?

Ancient Post Randomizer™

I can’t be held responsible for what you find here. I’ve been blogging for over 15 years, yo.