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Sex toys for all giveaway winners

Graphic of all the amazing prizes in vector form. SO MANY!
All graphics by the incomparable Aerie. Hire them for any and all projects!
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I’m exhausted, y’all. Turns out, awarding over 50 sex toy prizes to over 50 different people is tiring! But I’m also stunned and humbled: over 5,000 individual human beings entered my huge annual giveaway. Thank you, all of you, especially those who left sappy comments on the post. I know I bribed you into saying nice things, but every nice thing still means a lot to me.

I wish I could give all of you the sex toys of your dreams, but at least Black Friday is this week, and I vow to faithfully keep you updated on the best sex toy deals in all the land.

Here are the winners. All have been notified and confirmed. Until my next giveaway (which surely will contain so many prizes I will have to hire an assistant to help me pick them), take care of yourselves… and each other.

Once again, huge thanks to all the companies who donated: SheVibeTantus, We-Vibe, Crystal Delights, DoxyEarly to BedSpareparts HardwearFun Factory, VibratexnjoyHole Punch ToysLELOFleshlight, Twisted MonkVixen Creations, LovehoneyStockroomMinna, Fucking SculpturesPink & WhiteOhMiBod, Dallas Novelty, Downunder ToysL’AmouroseBabeland, Self Delve, LiberatorGood Vibrations, Tenga, Womanizer, and Hot Octopuss.

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  1. You’ve kind of given away two Pure Wands, since that’s what I decided to get with the She Vibe gift card! (It was a hard decision, but then I figured your recommendations haven’t steered me wrong yet, and I don’t have any G-spot toys, and the Pure Wand is something I would never by for myself because omg that’s SO MUCH MONEY if i somehow manage to hate it…)

    I could thank you a whole bunch, but I think I’d rather give you a story that demonstrates just how much of an affect you’ve had on my life (or at least my toybox): A play partner introduced me to the Eroscillator the other day, and despite him repeatedly telling me what it’s called, my brain could only hold onto “the one Epiphora really likes”… that was fun to try to explain with the few brain cells I had left at that point.

  2. I looove the line of reasoning! I hope the Pure Wand is as good for you as it is for me.

    Petition to re-brand the Eroscillator as “the one Epiphora really likes,” YES

    Backstory: I’ve been taking an SSRI for several months that has made orgasms impossible. But the Rosa Rogue not only made it possible, but I realized that I DO, in fact, have a g spot (I was convinced I simply did not have one because I’ve never felt the feeling people describe before)! I’ve also never owned a real vibrator before, and now I completely understand what you mean by “buzzy” and “rumbly”. It’s funny that the rosa kind of has both (the arm is rumbly, but the base seems kind of higher frequency buzzish).

    I just, I don’t even know, I just want to thank you for the orgasms. I thought I was completely unable to enjoy a sex life anymore, but this has changed everything.

  4. Congrats to all the winners, and thanks again, Epiphora for wrangling the prizes and doing all the administrative stuffs (above and beyond the awesome blogging!) and to the companies who donated!

  5. I’m coming back here to thank you once again for the Fucking Sculptures prize. I got my Corkscrew and, as much as I wanted to love the Pure Wand, the Corkscrew hits my g-spot better than it ever could. The pure Wand worked, but was a little too heavy for my vagina and always felt ..too aggressive, and caught weirdly on my pubic bone. The medium-sized corkscrew is killer. I’m so happy. Thank you!

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