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  • Reviews
    Reviews

    The bread and butter of this blog: sex toy reviews! Want to browse my reviews in a different way? Check out my Toybox, consult my list of tags, or jump to the worst stuff I’ve tried or my favorites.

    A basket of fruit and vegetables (carrot, cucumber, yam, corn, bunch of bananas) in the grass, on top of a tea towel with the word "MASTURBATION" on it.

    Produce fucking: which fruit or veggie makes the best dildo?

    Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

    Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal. Cassette player lying in the grass, surrounded by sex toys and Epiphora-labeled cassette tapes.

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Review: We-Vibe Touch X + Tango X

  • Guides
    Guides

    Let me teach you things! Such as how to become a savvy sex toy shopper and avoid sex toys that will poison you.

    Me holding the Lovehoney Flash and Doxy Don, demonstrating the way one moves much more visibly than the other (and thus is much rumblier).

    Buzzy vs. rumbly: the most important aspect of a vibrator

    A selection of toxic sex toys. They smell like beach balls.

    Your genitals deserve better: the case against toxic sex toys

    Epiphora’s best and worst sex toys of 2018

    September 2014: Ejaculate all over my leg and soaked through a towel from the njoy Pure Wand.

    How I know squirting is real (and also not pee)

    Colorful vibrators and kegel balls surrounded by iridescent curly ribbons.

    Epiphora’s sex toy gift-giving guide

  • Banter
    Banter

    Ramblings, usually about sex toys, sometimes about my gaping vagina, sometimes about sex-related falsehoods perpetuated by the media. Notable subcategories include Disingenuous Assholes and True Life: I’m A Sex Toy Reviewer.

    Me wearing my harness with the Vixen Creations Leo dildo inside, an orange dildo with a bat pattern.

    Queer sex party chronicles: pumpkin spice orgy

    Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool's retrospective

    Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool’s retrospective

    A circle of people wearing harnesses and dildos, arranged in a circle and shot from above. Dildos pointing into the middle.

    Queer sex party chronicles: a magical birthday

    A basket of fruit and vegetables (carrot, cucumber, yam, corn, bunch of bananas) in the grass, on top of a tea towel with the word "MASTURBATION" on it.

    Produce fucking: which fruit or veggie makes the best dildo?

    Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

    Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

  • New here?
    • Get directions!
    • Greatest hits
    • Tags & categories
  • Toybox
  • All-time faves
  • Buy toys
    Buy toys
    Dildos on display, courtesy of Early to Bed, one of my favorite indie sex shops.

    Epiphora-approved sex toy shops

    Various sex toys laid out on a grey table next to a rainbow blanket, with hang tags displaying handwritten prices.

    Sex toy sales, deals, and promos

    Finn Carson and Calvin Banks kissing, on CockyBoys

    Epiphora-approved porn

  • FAQ
  • Random

LELO

LELO is a well-known Swedish sex toy brand with a high-end aesthetic. My favorites: Mona 2 (I have three of them…), Siri 2, Ella, and the Luna Beads. Their rechargeables tend to hold their charges FOREVER.

However, they’ve had their share of fuck-ups. See: Sona, Pino, Ida, Ora, and the SmartWands.

Latest
  • Latest
  • Oldest
  • Random
  • A to Z
Graphic of the latest sex toys.
FeaturesSex Toy News

Sex toy news: inclusive marketing and a vibrator with a butt

February 11, 2019
One of my favorite dildos — which was tragically discontinued years ago — has risen from the dead! Once known...
Keep Reading
Best & Worst Sex Toys of the YearGuides

Epiphora’s best and worst sex toys of 2018

December 31, 2018
Before we give the middle finger to 2018, please come along with me on a romp through the year in...
Keep Reading
LELO Sona "sonic" air flow vibrator on a flower-patterned plate.
Air Flow, Thrusters & MovementSex Toy Reviews

Review: Sona Cruise

November 13, 2018
You could almost hear the collective groan from the entire sex toy industry when LELO announced the Sona. After an...
Keep Reading
FeaturesSex Toy News

Sex toy news: thrustin’, suckin’, and lube dispensin’

January 10, 2018
Most important news first, y’all: Fun Factory’s Stronic G is a REVELATION. Like the other Stronics, this toy thrusts all...
Keep Reading
FeaturesSex Toy News

Sex toy news: rimming butt plugs and LELO’s gravest mistake

July 8, 2016
Easily the most exciting news this time around comes from Doxy, who previewed several shiny bullet vibes at ETO, both...
Keep Reading
LELO Siri 2 vibrator on top of a bunch of sun-bleached rocks.
Hi, I love youSex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Siri 2

May 21, 2016
FINALLY. Fucking finally. I’ve been waiting years for LELO to upgrade their humble little clit vibe, Siri. While they were...
Keep Reading
Me holding the Lovehoney Flash and Doxy Don, demonstrating the way one moves much more visibly than the other (and thus is much rumblier).
Anyway How's Your Sex Life?BanterGreatest HitsGuides

Buzzy vs. rumbly: the most important aspect of a vibrator

May 10, 2016
Perusing the sex toy exhibitor booths at AVN, turning on and off strange vibrators from no-name companies, one word kept...
Keep Reading
Miss Bi, a dual vibe with two strong-ass motors; Calice, an oddly-shaped mini vibe (my girlfriend: "it's like someone said, make it look like a penis AND a vulva"), and Bi Stronic Fusion,
FeaturesSex Toy News

Sex toy news: scented vibrators and remote-controlled underwear

November 7, 2015
Fun Factory has a whole host of new stuff! There’s Miss Bi, a dual vibe with two strong-ass motors; Calice, an...
Keep Reading
Ask Piph logo, with a sex toy forming the question mark.
Ask PiphGuides

Ask Piph #7

March 23, 2015
Since rabbits fit everyone so differently, I’m wondering if you could tell me how far your clit is from your...
Keep Reading
LELO Mona Wave rechargeable G-spot vibrator on a rainy cement surface.
Air Flow, Thrusters & MovementGreatest HitsSex Toy Reviews

Review: Mona Wave

January 26, 2015
The LELO Mona Wave feels like being fingered by someone who is absent-mindedly planning out the toppings on the pizza they’re...
Keep Reading
Best & Worst Sex Toys of the YearGuides

Epiphora’s best and worst sex toys of 2014

December 30, 2014
Oh hey, remember 2014? It was the year I was a guest on Sex Out Loud Radio, I taught a...
Keep Reading
Black LELO Ora (original), blue LELO Ora 2 on a hardwood floor.
Air Flow, Thrusters & MovementGreatest HitsSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Ora 2

December 15, 2014
I wish the entirety of this review could just be the word no. Not even repeated for emphasis, not even in...
Keep Reading
LELO Pino... a cock ring "exclusively for bankers"
FeaturesGreatest HitsHell Yes / Um, No

Um, No: Pino

November 24, 2014
We need to talk about what’s happening with LELO. For about three years, they’ve mostly been releasing convoluted, overpriced, “innovative” pieces...
Keep Reading
LELO Hula Beads in the snow.
Air Flow, Thrusters & MovementKegel ExercisersSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Hula Beads

November 19, 2014
Imagine a cat with its head tilted to the side in puzzlement. That is me whenever I use the LELO...
Keep Reading
Tenga Iroha Minamo
FeaturesSex Toy News

Sex toy news: squishy vibes and crowdfunded weirdness

November 3, 2014
Let’s start with the stuff I’m actually psyched about, eh? Fun Factory has edited their Share double-ended dildo so that it includes a rechargeable vibrating bullet. GIVE TO ME, YES. They also released the Boss dildo, and several battery-operated vibes: Joupie, Jazzie, and Jam. Tenga has also been hard at...
Keep Reading
Artistic representation winners: Monapoly by SnarkIsRequired, watercolor by Mandi, shadowbox by Coryphelle
Giveaways

The great Mona summer party winners

September 9, 2014
It wouldn’t be enough to call my great Mona summer party giveaway a success. Over 1,000 humans entered via the widget,...
Keep Reading
1 2 3 4

Latest posts

Epiphora's best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday!

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday! (2024)

Me wearing my harness with the Vixen Creations Leo dildo inside, an orange dildo with a bat pattern.

Queer sex party chronicles: pumpkin spice orgy

Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool's retrospective

Dildo jokes forever: a 15-year April Fool’s retrospective

Epiphora's Black Friday sex toy sales and deals!

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday! (2023)

A circle of people wearing harnesses and dildos, arranged in a circle and shot from above. Dildos pointing into the middle.

Queer sex party chronicles: a magical birthday

Recent comments

Greatest Hits

njoy Pure Wand stainless steel G-spot dildo on a painting of the ocean waves.

My love, the Pure Wand (+ a few tips!)

Minn kGoal kegel exerciser vibrator and my Android phone

Review: kGoal

Afterglow PulseWave vibrator showing off its useless laser light energy.

Review: Afterglow

Bottles of Sliquid lined up: Sliquid Sea, Organics Gel, and Sassy.

My favorite lube? Sliquid anything

Me wearing my harness with the Vixen Creations Leo dildo inside, an orange dildo with a bat pattern.

Queer sex party chronicles: pumpkin spice orgy

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