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  • Reviews
    Reviews

    The bread and butter of this blog: sex toy reviews! Want to browse my reviews in a different way? Check out my Toybox, consult my list of tags, or jump to the worst stuff I’ve tried or my favorites.

    Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

    Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal. Cassette player lying in the grass, surrounded by sex toys and Epiphora-labeled cassette tapes.

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Review: We-Vibe Touch X + Tango X

    Dame Kip and Pom rechargeable silicone bullet vibrators

    Review: Dame Kip and Pom

  • Guides
    Guides

    Let me teach you things! Such as how to become a savvy sex toy shopper and avoid sex toys that will poison you.

    Me holding the Lovehoney Flash and Doxy Don, demonstrating the way one moves much more visibly than the other (and thus is much rumblier).

    Buzzy vs. rumbly: the most important aspect of a vibrator

    A selection of toxic sex toys. They smell like beach balls.

    Your genitals deserve better: the case against toxic sex toys

    Epiphora’s best and worst sex toys of 2018

    September 2014: Ejaculate all over my leg and soaked through a towel from the njoy Pure Wand.

    How I know squirting is real (and also not pee)

    Colorful vibrators and kegel balls surrounded by iridescent curly ribbons.

    Epiphora’s sex toy gift-giving guide

  • Banter
    Banter

    Ramblings, usually about sex toys, sometimes about my gaping vagina, sometimes about sex-related falsehoods perpetuated by the media. Notable subcategories include Disingenuous Assholes and True Life: I’m A Sex Toy Reviewer.

    Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

    Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

    Porn gems: playful domination & fireside fucking

    A hand caressing the tattooed leg of a person wearing a strap-on: the New York Collective Shilo dildo.

    Queer sex party chronicles: every night a blank slate

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal. Cassette player lying in the grass, surrounded by sex toys and Epiphora-labeled cassette tapes.

    Sex blogger field notes: audio journal

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

    Sex toys getting me through the pandemic

  • New here?
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  • All-time faves
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    Buy toys
    Dildos on display, courtesy of Early to Bed, one of my favorite indie sex shops.

    Epiphora-approved sex toy shops

    Various sex toys laid out on a grey table next to a rainbow blanket, with hang tags displaying handwritten prices.

    Sex toy sales, deals, and promos

    Finn Carson and Calvin Banks kissing, on CockyBoys

    Epiphora-approved porn

  • FAQ
  • Random

LELO

LELO is a well-known Swedish sex toy brand with a high-end aesthetic. My favorites: Mona 2 (I have three of them…), Siri 2, Ella, and the Luna Beads. Their rechargeables tend to hold their charges FOREVER.

However, they’ve had their share of fuck-ups. See: Sona, Pino, Ida, Ora, and the SmartWands.

Latest
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Artistic representation winners: Monapoly by SnarkIsRequired, watercolor by Mandi, shadowbox by Coryphelle
Giveaways

The great Mona summer party winners

September 9, 2014
It wouldn’t be enough to call my great Mona summer party giveaway a success. Over 1,000 humans entered via the widget,...
Keep Reading
Giveaway: the great LELO Mona 2 vibrator summer party!
Adventures in SquirtingGiveaways

Giveaway: the great Mona summer party!

August 1, 2014
Put on your sunhats, make your best lemonade, and fill up the pool, because the time has come for the greatest party...
Keep Reading
The LELO Mona 2 rechargeable vibrator in three colors: purple, red, and cerise (pink), lying on a cream-colored knit fabric.
Anyway How's Your Sex Life?BanterHi, I love youSex Toy ReviewsSunshine & RainbowsToybox ReportsVibrators

I got back-ups of my favorite vibrator and life is perfect

May 12, 2014
I don’t know if you’ve heard: I love my LELO Mona 2. So much that I yell things like “THE MONA IS...
Keep Reading
Fucking Sculptures Double Trouble glass dildo
FeaturesSex Toy News

Sex toy news: uncircumcised packers and questionable marketing choices

April 14, 2014
Vibratex has released a series of rechargeable mini vibes called The Girls. Princessa looks just freakish enough for me to...
Keep Reading
LELO Gigi 2 rechargeable G-spot vibrator on a newspaper.
Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Gigi 2

February 17, 2014
The Gigi used to be one of LELO’s flagship toys. A true fan favorite. The kind of toy people would keep...
Keep Reading
Fun Factory Amorino
FeaturesSex Toy News

Sex toy news: long-distance sex toys and useless gimmicks

January 13, 2014
The BIG! NEWS! of the moment is LELO’s latest product, the Ora. It’s basically a re-imagined SaSi, which I gotta...
Keep Reading
Best & Worst Sex Toys of the YearGuides

Epiphora’s best and worst sex toys of 2013

December 31, 2013
2013 was a good year. I attended CatalystCon East AND CatalystCon West (even doing a panel), hit 500 posts, became a superhero, conducted my most elaborate April Fool’s...
Keep Reading
LELO Smart Wands, black with silver handles, lying on a hardwood floor.
Sex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Smart Wands (medium and large)

December 21, 2013
Unreliable. That’s the word I’d use to describe the LELO Smart Wands. Not an adjective you want applied to any...
Keep Reading
Colorful vibrators and kegel balls surrounded by iridescent curly ribbons.
Greatest HitsGuides

Epiphora’s sex toy gift-giving guide

November 15, 2013
If you ask me, sex toys are way better gifts than socks or body wash. Now I may be biased,...
Keep Reading
Tenga Vi-Bo vibrators
FeaturesSex Toy News

Sex toy news: vibrating orbs and pony tail butt plugs

October 14, 2013
The We-Vibe 4 is almost here. It’s smaller than the We-Vibe 3, with a much-improved remote. But it’s only available...
Keep Reading
LELO Ida vibrator in a box of various nail polishes.
Air Flow, Thrusters & MovementGreatest HitsSex Toy ReviewsSlush pileVibrators

Review: Ida

October 10, 2013
I think my boyfriend is going to break up with me over the LELO Ida. I can see it in...
Keep Reading
LELO Ida "couples'" vibrator
FeaturesSex Toy News

The LELO Ida is coming…

September 23, 2013
So I have this in my possession: And yes, that is exactly what it does. It swivels and swivels and...
Keep Reading
LELO Mia 2 in the Adore Me Pleasure Set, lots of red satin-y stuff surrounding the vibrator.
BDSMSex Toy ReviewsVibrators

Review: Mia 2 and Adore Me Pleasure Set

February 4, 2013
The LELO Mia and I go way back. Almost to the beginning of this blog. A lot of things have...
Keep Reading
Red Tenga Flip Hole and LELO Mona 2.
Giveaways

Red sex toy giveaway winners!

January 28, 2013
Whooooosh! That’s the sound of my red sex toy giveaway going by in a flash. Usually my giveaways last a...
Keep Reading
LELO Luna Beads Mini lying in a dish full of colorful stones.
Kegel ExercisersSex Toy Reviews

Review: Luna Beads Mini

January 10, 2013
This is so disappointing, you guys. And a sex toy reviewer’s nightmare. But I just cannot feel the LELO Luna Beads...
Keep Reading
LELO Mia 2 vibrator
FeaturesSex Toy News

Sex toy news: bejeweled dildos and shell-shaped cock rings

December 17, 2012
It looks like Papaya Toys is finally releasing the Ice, a silicone dildo with an acrylic jewel embedded in one...
Keep Reading
1 2 3 4

Fresh tweets

Latest posts

Lora DiCarlo Osé twisted up in the only semi-usable position. Also some others from the line: Baci, Carezza, and Filare.

Good riddance, Lora DiCarlo

Best sex toy deals for Black Friday + Cyber Monday!

Epiphora's orgasmic getaway giveaway! ($1,500 grand prize, 80+ prizes)

Orgasmic getaway giveaway! ($1,500 grand prize, 80+ prizes)

Porn gems: playful domination & fireside fucking

Movie Night: The Final Member

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  • Latest posts
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