A couple days ago, I decided it was time. Time to clean ALL THE THINGS — err, actually organize my sex...
Banter
Ramblings, usually about sex toys, sometimes about my gaping vagina, sometimes about sex-related falsehoods perpetuated by the media. Notable subcategories include Disingenuous Assholes and True Life: I’m A Sex Toy Reviewer.
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June 6th, 2010 Here’s a little secret for you: I’ve been jacking off to words lately. I know, blasphemy. I usually...
May 8th, 2010 Eight days into May and I haven’t jacked off yet. I need to work on life. I...
Dearest Turbo Glider, Hello, my dear. It’s been a while, I know. A few trysts here and there, but things...
April 6th, 2010 Wow, most frustrating masturbation session in a long time. I watched, but not really, Fashionistas, which wasn’t...
EdenFantasys is a huge presence in the world of online sex shops. But ubiquity does not equal goodness, and behind...
Bartenders is the newest, yet-to-be-released feature porno from Burning Angel. Now, it takes serious hilarity to make me laugh aloud...
Good morning to me! Hello [my legal name], Please be advised we have disabled your contributor account at EdenFantasys.com This decision...
My mom is having a sex toy party. I knew the moment I read the email that I wanted to...
The Jimmyjane Form 2 was so close to perfect. Until it wasn’t anymore. I started noticing, while using the Form...
I was recently watching a video about the hymen made by Kara Sutra, in which she recommended HealthyStrokes.com for its...
I used to be frightened of realistic dildos. The flesh tones, the veins, the balls — all of it. It...
Dear this spammy ad’s target audience: I don’t think getting ripped will be enough. Here’s a better idea… Have a...
March 4th, 2010 You know what’s hard to watch? An hour and 16 minutes of nothing but cocksucking. But I...
Hey, watch battery bullets — have I told you lately to suck it? No? Yeah, that’s because usually when a...
I have tried many dildos that hit my G-spot with varying degrees of accuracy and sensation. Some stimulate it very...