Okay, so, Topco has this new toy line entitled Fucked, and… I’m don’t even know what to think about it....
Banter
Ramblings, usually about sex toys, sometimes about my gaping vagina, sometimes about sex-related falsehoods perpetuated by the media. Notable subcategories include Disingenuous Assholes and True Life: I’m A Sex Toy Reviewer.
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A couple days ago, I decided it was time. Time to clean ALL THE THINGS — err, actually organize my sex...
June 6th, 2010 Here’s a little secret for you: I’ve been jacking off to words lately. I know, blasphemy. I usually...
May 8th, 2010 Eight days into May and I haven’t jacked off yet. I need to work on life. I...
Dearest Turbo Glider, Hello, my dear. It’s been a while, I know. A few trysts here and there, but things...
April 6th, 2010 Wow, most frustrating masturbation session in a long time. I watched, but not really, Fashionistas, which wasn’t...
EdenFantasys is a huge presence in the world of online sex shops. But ubiquity does not equal goodness, and behind...
Bartenders is the newest, yet-to-be-released feature porno from Burning Angel. Now, it takes serious hilarity to make me laugh aloud...
Good morning to me! Hello [my legal name], Please be advised we have disabled your contributor account at EdenFantasys.com This decision...
My mom is having a sex toy party. I knew the moment I read the email that I wanted to...
The Jimmyjane Form 2 was so close to perfect. Until it wasn’t anymore. I started noticing, while using the Form...
I was recently watching a video about the hymen made by Kara Sutra, in which she recommended HealthyStrokes.com for its...
I used to be frightened of realistic dildos. The flesh tones, the veins, the balls — all of it. It...
Dear this spammy ad’s target audience: I don’t think getting ripped will be enough. Here’s a better idea… Have a...
March 4th, 2010 You know what’s hard to watch? An hour and 16 minutes of nothing but cocksucking. But I...
Hey, watch battery bullets — have I told you lately to suck it? No? Yeah, that’s because usually when a...
